What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

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Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

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A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

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Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

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you know what hurts.... PAIN

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What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

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Why did lisa fall of her bike? Because her dad threw a refrigerator at her. -JCB

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what is the hardest part of eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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A man is watching a football game and sees a comercial for a medicine that boosts testosterone levels. However, this man has no issues with his testosterone levels, so he proceeds to watch the rest of the game and then goes to bed.

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why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

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Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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Yo mama is so old, the bone structure of her spine has decayed significantly since she stopped growing and has therefore shrunken in height considerably. Her face and hands have accumulated abundant visual wear; wrinkles, and has arthritis as well.

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What did the Black construction worker say to the Asian salesman? I want some milk.

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I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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