Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

Your mums a potato

sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

The bird is not the word.... Its two

Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

So a blonde woman gets into her car. She then drives to the grocery store because she is hungry and wants to buy food to make her dinner.

A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

BIG MAC'S

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

Q: What did Yoda do at the end of star wars when he lost his light saber? A: He asked the prop guy if he had any more and he happened to have another and they went on with making the great film many still love today.

I got drunk last night and woke up in a bed and that's when I saw it. A 400 pound woman was in front of me and I could see the sweat drip down her ass fat and she let out a putrid fart right in my face. It smelt like rotten eggs and cheesy cauliflower. I am horrified.

A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Will Smiths rapping attempt was suprisingly not harmful to his career as he later played in blockbusters such as Independence Day, Men in Black, The Pursuit of Happiness ect..

whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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