What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

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Q: What's different about a boy and a girl? A: Nothing. There used to be a notable difference but nowadays you have to strain in order to tell them apart.

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Try not to laugh at this joke... Knock knock Who's there? Ha ha ha Ha ha ha who? I told you not to laugh

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Once upon a time, a princess was hungry. and there was a frog wearing a tux for some reason.so the princess ate him. THE END.

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Doorbell salesman.

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

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How do you break up with a guy? you kick him in the nuts.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

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why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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What did Katniss say to her sister? hi

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I love Japan. It's the bomb.

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Manchester City

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

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Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

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Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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