A man is walking down the street when, on the other side, he see's another man, with what appears to be an orange for a head. Unable to contain his curiosity, he approaches and enquires: "Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you have you have an orange for a head..." "That's right" says the man with an orange for a head. "I met a magical genie one day who granted me three wishes..." "Amazing" says the first man, "Please continue". "Well, for my first wish, I wished I was incredibly rich, and that every day, I woke up in a four-poster bed full of used bank notes, and a statement with twenty zeros". "Did that happen?" askes the first man. "It did indeed", replies the man with an orange for a head. "I'm probably the richest man in the world". "Amazing!" replies the first man. "What did you wish for next?" "For my second wish, I wished to be incredibly attractive to women, and that every day, in my four poster bed full of money, when I awoke, there would be three of the most beautiful, naked women imaginable." "Wow! Did THAT happen?" "Of course! To be honest though, that gets a bit of a bind - walking around is a bit difficult these days, in fact, I'm on my way to pick up some cream." "No way, that's amazing!" says the first man. "What was your third wish?" "Well..." replies the man with an orange for a head, "For my third wish, I wished I had an orange for a head."

What is white And taste like sheep A sheep

why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms why did no one pick her up? she was an orphan why did she drown? puddle...

Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

How many dead babies can you fit in a mini? It is variable according to the size of each baby.

What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

A blond and a brunette are on the moon. The brunette says to the blond "I'm glad that independent company's are taking the job of American space travel."

Blind people can't read this.

Why did the guy have one shoe? Because he took one shoe off at a time

What's up? Not the Twin Towers.

His face was drawn, but the curtains were real.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

Why did the chicken die? He tried to cross a road by an alleyway, therefore getting hit by a double decker bus and the alleyway has nothing to do with it. Also, the chicken had one leg and was blind.

What do you call a black man in space? A space monkey.

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

How many dead bodies does it take to fill up a bathtub? Wellll.......... It depends on how big the bathtub is.

Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

I'm a champion. I do what I want.

Why do black people like fried chicken? -Because all races like fried chicken.

So this Horse walked into a bar... Just kidding, it was Sarah Jessica Parker.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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