why did the moose cross the road? to eat the baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats the difference between a black an white guy? They have different skin tones

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A girl who really needs to see the doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +223

You know what happens when there's an awkward silence... Everyone feels a little bit uncomfortable for a brief moment in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

thumb_up thumb_down +33

When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did one duck say to the other? Quack.

thumb_up thumb_down +307

whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

hey fat ass u want some butter with them rolls?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops