What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Me "knock knock" Tramp "who's there" Me "nobody you havent got a door"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -115

A man walked into a bar There were some other people there too

thumb_up thumb_down

You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +5

this last joke was a correction to the other one

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Come on Red, I am linked with the fucking global bank, that does not mean I go there and get the money! The FBI keeps tabs on absolutely everything, everybody knows that, if Mike Tyson has a cup of tea there, they file him down. Its legal, its secure and incredibly expensive, but the FBI stands for the security of the US alone, that does not mean that they do not work with every other corporation, organization, affiliation,syndicate, and pff, anything. If you suspect that I somehow went from being one of the key members of the underground, to a fucking FBI agent, you can believe that, but then dont ask me for help, nor be my friend, without trust there is no friendship.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

poop

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why isn't Juley at school today? Oh Her father chopped off her arms and legs, gagged her, ripped out both eyes and threw her in a lake tied to cinderblocks!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I hate all races.. Especially the 400 meter sprint

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops