Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

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when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

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Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

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Roses are red violets are blue. Yes.

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

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So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

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Whenever someone asks you why you're sad, always remember this simple answer so that people won't keep asking you more questions: "Because Hitler died"

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Click thumb up i will be eternally grateful

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What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

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A guy walks into a bar. NOT!

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my mom died because she was morbidly obese

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to foodstuffs.

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police are looking for max 'cheesehead' harrison

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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