A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

wsedrtyujiKFKJKLEFL;LKJRG Blame the economy. Don't hit me, I'm a girl! EQUAL RIGHTS, EQUAL RIGHTS!

what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

heres a great game to play... DEATH TO BABIES!

want to hear a bird joke? no well, this is hawkward

How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

Person 1: Why don't you want to date me? Person 2: Because you are ugly Person 1: Why am I ugly? Person 2: Because you have bad features. Person 1: Why do i have bad features? Person 2: It's your genetics. Person 1: Why is it my genetics Person 2: Cuz that's the way god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: Because god's god made you Person 1: Why Person 2: Because the god of god of god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: That's the way the god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of (GOES ON FOREVER!!!) made you.

3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

Your mom is so poor; she doesn't have a job.

What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

Yo mamas so dirty she has to take showers regularly so the stench of her pungent body odor is at a minimum.

why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

Why did Tim sit on the chair? Because potato.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side which would be a incontrovertible (obvious) decision.

What is big, black, and hairy? A coconut.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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