Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

connor sucks

thumb_up thumb_down -5

ROSES ARE RED FRIENDS ARE FRIENDS, NO MUTUAL FRIEND, WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TRYING TO ADD ME ON FACEBOOK BITCH!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a place where all hopes and dreams go to die as this place is contained of depression and the lingering smell of death? www.anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

i was gunna write a joke..but i took an arrow to me knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? one, its a fairly easy task

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:what word starts with "p" and ends with "orn"? A: popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Did you hear about the man with 3 balls? He liked tennis

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why do Jews have big noses? Because it is genetic.

thumb_up thumb_down -90

How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops