A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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Dear diary, its day 230, the apple supply's are running low, the doctors are closing in, the dentists have been chanting "its time to go to the dentist" all day, I wont be able to hold them back much longer, help.

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Which hockey player has scored the monst goals of all time? He-Shoot-Si Scores

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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What is black and white and red all over? Two Nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride a bicycle? Because Timmy was a goldfish

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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how do u talk to a person you like go up and talk to them

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What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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Coldpaly is a good band

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A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what will you have". The man says "Friendship" and bursts out crying. At this point he is making a scene and security will have too be called.

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

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What does a hooker eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Food.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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