Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

What's the difference between a Watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

Knock Knock! Who's there? ... THE DOOR!!

A seal walks into a club.

Why did susie fall off the swing? Because an arrow penetrated her head.

what bounces and is blue all over? a blue bouncy ball

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

A dead guy walks into a grave.

What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

One day a black man, a white man, and an Asian man decide to bet on who has the longest penis. The white man wins by 1/18th of an inch, effectively disproving the stereotype. They all go home a little gayer for the experience.

why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

And the guy who played Trapper John on MASH wins the coveted 'Last Famous TV Person to Die in 2015' award!!! Woooooooo!!!!

What do you say to a blind buss driver? You suck

"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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