there's 4 men, a rabbi, a priest, a monk, and a captain. they all go on the captain's ship for a cruise with a couple hundred people. this was during the cold war, and the ship was mistaken for a war ship, and the russians missled it. the monk says: "we have to get everyone off the ship!" the rabbit say: "NO! the women and children need to get off first! And we should also hail to Satan!" the Captain says: "OMG! It's a talking Rabbit!" the priest then stops the rabbit to death!" the rabbi says: "The rabbit is right! But just the children!" The Captain says: "Screw the children! this ship is going to Hell, we have talking animals saying we should worship the devil!" the priest says: "Do you think we have time" the monk, the rabbi, and the captain stare and beat him to death.... "Well, he was already going to Hell" the Monk says. But during this entire time the ship has been sinking and another missle blows up the ship. Everyone dies, except for Sean Conery...and Chuck Norris.

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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Why did the dog bite justin beiber? Why not?

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how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty eight year olds? They are of the legal age

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4 African men walk into a convientent store, withdrawal 50$ from there primary bank accounts and buy gas for the ride to there jobs at McDonalds

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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Whats worse than burning your foot? Getting it eaten off by a cannibal.

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Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? One has a complex circulatory system the other is a pizza.

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If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

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Why did the dog lick his balls? Because he can.

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mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

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Obama is a black man living in a white house. TEEHEE

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have a proper grip on it.

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Q) You know how I know your gay A) Cuz your gay

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What can u see in the dark that u can't see in the light? Absolutely nothing

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How do you make a homeless man cry? you throw away his trash.

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

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The tooth fairy, Santa and, Justin Beiber are the same, little kids believe in them, whats wrong with America these days

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quantum physics?

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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