Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

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Do you really want to know what i shit? Poo

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

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What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Why did the black man die? He was shot

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Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

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A penguin bikes to a bakery, the baker asks him "what kind of bread do you want?" Penguin replies "it doesn't matter, im biking"

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How many ADD teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? Most likely only one. With advances in modern medicine, adolescents are experiencing large improvements in their abilities to focus on things from schoolwork to lightbulb changing!

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justin littleton being sucessful

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

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how many Mexicans does it take to fix a light bulb? One, a Mexican can fix any thing.

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whats worse than a worm in your apple? the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust? two worms in your apple

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting thrown into the sun.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? That's right.

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wanna here a good joke? me too.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride a bicycle? Because Timmy was a goldfish

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What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

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Snow White found a magic lamp in the middle of the forest. She rubbed it and became pregnant because the spout was a penis.

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How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

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...this makes a cop throw a car and then call "inception!"

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Look, gullible is written in the sky! The man looks up and there it is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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