Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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Yo mama is so fat because she doesn't exercise and eats way too much calories. The reason fat people gain weight is because of low metabolism which means her body is not burning a lot of fat and instead is storing fat. A healthy life style such as playing sports, walking in a park, or eating healthy foods will benefit her from any medical complications in the future.

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what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

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Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

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Whats bigger than a toaster and smaller than an oven? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... .... . ... . . . ..... ...... ..... a microwave . ..... . ... ...

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

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How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

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-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

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Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

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What are the four season of Canada? Cold, cold, cold and road work.

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

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whats dirtier than lady gaga's penis in justin bieber's vagina? nothing.

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What was Helen Keller book called Bsnshsiengwkaisg

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What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts.

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Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

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There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

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Why did the chicken cross the road It was being dragged to the other side by fox It's the way of life _._._

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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