What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

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2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

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A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

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Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Q: Why doesn't the young lady speak very much? A: Because she's a whore

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat up the room for being black

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Three women are sitting in a bar. One is drinking beer, one is drinking wine and one is drinking vodka. Which one is the widow? The one whose husband is dead.

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Q: Why is 8 afraid of 9? A:Because 9 killed 8's family

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Q:a black man walks down the street with alot of light whats happaning he A:is it the parade of light

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Knock Knock. Who's There? A Banana. The middle aged man opened the door, prepared to distribute candy to the trick or treaters.

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

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Girl: How do I know if I'm Jewish? Guy: Are you Jewish? Girl: No. Guy: There ya go.

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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A man goes to the till of a 7-11 to buy a 12-pack of condoms. "Busy night?" asks the cashier boldly. The man complains to the store's manager about the cashier's misconduct and she is given a formal warning.

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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What did the "gangster" looking black guy ask the white guy he approached randomly on the street? "Excuse me sir, are you aware of the injustices done toward the jewish community that has been the decline of western society since the reclamation proclamation?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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