Feeling alone fast after opening your mouth? Feel that people ignore your conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say AHAH!... And Uhuh, and I PERFECTLY UNDERSTAND! Now YOU CAN BE APPRECIATED INSTANTLY BY A BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE SAYING!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's the police, they ask the questions.

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Q: What did the 6 year old cancer patient say he wanted to be when he was older? A: Doesn't matter he died

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What's small and red that sits in a corner? A baby with a razor blade.

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

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Why are Asians bad drivers? There Not. Have you ever seen Tokyo Drift?

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

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How do you get a girl out of a tree? You throw a refrigirator at her.

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What is the difference between a rabbit and a stick? One lives and one not.

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What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

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bill: HEY! your moma so fat bob:so i dont care shes gonna die soon anyway

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hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

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whats funny? a relatsion ship for 16 hours

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theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

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How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

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What do you call a joke without a punchline?

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Bill:Ask me to do something. Bob:Go get me a beer Bill:Would you like fries with that?

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A guy walks into a bar... Ouch

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What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

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What do you call it when a black man and a japanese woman get married? A wedding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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