Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

What do you call a middle eastern man flying a plane?? A pilot.

Womens rights

Knock knock Who's there? Hurry up, let me in! Hurry up, let me in, who? *gunshot*

why did Max cry??? chicken

knock knok whos there? Jacob Jacob who? U know, your friend!

What did the scuba diver say to his partner when he got stuck in some seaweed. Something that sort of sounded like glug, or maybe blub, or some other sound you would hear trying to talk underwater.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

a mushroom walks in to a little boys party the boy says why are u here mushroom says because im a fun-guy (fungis,fungi)

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

Did you hear the one about the kid that farted in class? Cool.

why can't Hellen Keller hear? she is deaf.

why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms

What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

Why did the frog cross the street? To make babies

Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

what is the awesomest of them all? me

''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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