Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

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"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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i hate it when Voldemort showers in my nutella

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what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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What drops its lunch every day? Yo mom

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Where did Sally go when she exploded? Everywhere!

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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Why did the tree stay home from school? Because, trees don't have school.

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how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

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solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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The Pope, Queen Elizabeth and a schoolboy are on a plane that is going to crash. It crashes and they all die instantly.

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Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

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hello there i am a male from the small town of balamory and i have just found a very large oblong with an acute right angle strongly attached to the left hand side........do you think i should hand it to the new york extra torestial services ?

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Why couldn't the blonde make ice cubes? Because recently she has been missing payments on the elictric bill because of economic hardships.

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

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Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops