What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

What do a a pickle and a rabbit have in common? They are both green...except the rabbit

A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

Yo momma's so stupid she comes up in a lot of jokes titled "yo momma jokes"

Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

What do you call poop in a black man's toilet? Poop.

why did the baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

9/11

What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Hey

what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

hey

Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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