what is worse than a pile of dead babies? the one on the bottom trying to eat its way out of a pile of babies that have been poisoned.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Womens rights. Are extremely valuable because women are equal.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Whats white and all over my room? paint

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happens when you get your leg caught in an elevator door? Nothing. It is likely that the elevator has advanced sensory components that won't allow the door to close on your leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Thomas Hobbes had a happy life. Actually he didnt, he was born prematurely causing his mother to die. Then his dad left him at an early age to the care of an abusive older brother because he was an alcohollic. He did inspire many political beliefs though

thumb_up thumb_down

Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why couldn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell of a building? She was wearing mittens.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I have no soul so I must consume yours

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

thumb_up thumb_down +30

*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

thumb_up thumb_down +196

69

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black guy with a gun? A police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the black person cross the road? Because the street light turned green

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +96

An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops