Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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What did the pauper want for Christmas? Money

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your parents are dead. And happy birthday!

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Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

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Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

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Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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A man walked into a bar, He then realised that he was likely to become the butt of a joke quite soon and subsequently left to take his kids to the park.

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

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A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

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So a catholic priest, a pedophile, and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a beer.

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whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

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John Stamos.

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Every sixty seconds in Africa... a minute passes - plz like to save Africa!

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Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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What is an offensive term to refer to black people who lived in the time of the Flintstones? n*ggers

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thumbs up!

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What do you get when you cross bread an eagle, a wolf and shark together? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it will kill all of us!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need to go to the bathroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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