What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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How do you scare a brunette? Hide behind a door or wall until the unsuspecting person walks by, then jump out and yell.

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Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

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If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

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If I had a dollar for every time I heard a 'women's rights' joke I'd be bill gates.

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I made a sandwich Lol jk, my gf made it for me

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a man? One's tall the other's not

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A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

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Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

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Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

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hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

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Me: You want pie? You: Yeah what flavour? Me: Pie flavour.

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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What is not funny Bad jokes!????

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What do you do if you see a man on the street with a pineapple up his bum? Take him to the hospital to have the pineapple removed professionally. It could be potentially dangerous for his health.

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What's the difference between and indian man and a barstool....... indians walked on the moon with a cow named chester.

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a rabbit? A dead rabbit...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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