A chicken and a triceratops walk into a bar. They both immediately recognize each other and start trading anti-jokes, of which no one else in the bar understood, for they are animals, and animals cannot speak. Which brings up the question of how the triceratops and the chicken would communicate in any way that was conversely accurate to how humans would make jokes. Also adding in the fact that they are both from different eras of time, and the people wonder why a triceratops is walking around when they are in fact extinct. Turns out, the triceratops was an animatronic that gained sentience and ran off the set of Jurassic Park IV, a movie production that was not yet announced, as Steven Spielberg was still working on other movies that were more important at the time. The chicken flew in here because he heard the bar was close-by to where he worked, so he decided to drop by after a long Friday. The bartender finally walks up and asks the triceratops, "What would you like?" The triceratops then went on a rampage and killed everyone inside because he was an alcoholic and lost his family because of it, since his ex-wife would be worked to the bone trying to raise his 2 children and adopted platypus son David. He lost everything in the divorce. Why was he in a bar then? I don't know, I can't talk to dinosaurs. The chicken then befriended the triceratops, as the chicken was a secret anarchist who sought to bring down all the stores on the street, as his mother was killed there while trying to cross the street. She fell into a manhole. The chicken and the triceratops then traded usernames on League of Legends then played out that Friday teaming up and taking down Evil. How do they play League if they're animals? Because this whole story is made up and you wasted a good 2-3 minutes trying to read this.

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Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

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What did the prostitute say to the pimp? Can I have $50? She was found three minutes later beaten to death with a purple cane, and had many imprssions of rings in her skull

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Mooses

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am disabled, so please help me poo.

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Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

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what did the cheese say to the other cheese nothing cheese can't talk

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Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

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why did the man beat his wife because he was mean

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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-Knock Knock? -Who's There? -David Baxter. -David Baxter Who? -Wha- What? What do you mean "David Baxter who?" We were best friends in high school. YOU WERE THE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING!! *David Baxter proceeds to cry, as he doesn't know of his dear friend's Alzheimer's disease*

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What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

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What's big, white, and when it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting anal raped twice

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Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

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What's under the first mate? The second mate.

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Q: Why was the baby crying? A: I kicked it.

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What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

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What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour

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Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops