Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

i like my coffee like i like my women... Without a penis

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

I'm a white rapper bro I do it all the time People don't like me cuz my words don't match

Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

why was the blond so easy,because ALL blonds are whores.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

Tony Blair, Micheal Jordan, Fabrice Muamba, Aunty Josephine, Nick Clegg, David Cameron, and myself all go out for drinks.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Plenty of things

Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

Why did the boy have sex with his grandpa? His grandpa is a nice guy and it was his birthday.

A man went back in time and warned nobody about anything and pretended to be from the time he choose to go to and lived a happy life eventually finding a wife. He later found out he had a baby on the way, he named it after his great grandfather who was a war hero. He later found out that many years later his son had a son and they named it after his grandpa. He went to the hospital where he died just as his grandson had a baby and they named it after his father. The man died. End.

Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

why can stevie wonder drive? He's blind

why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

Why did the ckicken cross the road? to kiss my ass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...