What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Non-believers.

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

Roses are red Violets are blue I like your mom Give me some glue

A man with AIDS walks into a bar, what does he say? I have AIDS

what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

What happened to the man that never got picked up? He died of a brain aneurysm, the ambulance never came.

whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

Do Minnesotans have accents? Oh ya, you betchya.

Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

Jacob Edwards has friends.

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

A midget goes up to a prostitute and asks "what’s the worst joke you ever heard?" She replies "probably this one

Q: What do you call a women with 2 bowling pins? A: A women with 2 bowling pins.

Whats brown and sticky A stick!!!!

What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Q. Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? A. Because he's dead.

Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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