What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

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A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

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So I says to the guy "take the money and run." He then takes my money and walks down the street.

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Oh look, a dead guy. He must have died

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Adam: knock knock!! Eve: who's there? Adam: don't be silly, just open the f*cking door!!

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Vagina-Boob

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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A horse walks into a bar, realizes that he shouldnt be here so he walks out.

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Guess who didn't have breakfast this morning? Kids in Africa

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Why did the basketball team from Detroit win the youth championship? Because they had a good coach amd dedicated, hard-working players.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? The Holocaust

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What do you catch a baby with? A pitchfork

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What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

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What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

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How does a blonde restart her computer? Seriously, you guys, I need help. I'm not a very technological person.

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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What happened to the orphan when it walked to the park? He found his birth parents........but then they were killed by a crazy hobo and he was taken away and molested

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

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Why didn't the man go to work? He got stabbed.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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