I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

What did the teacher do? He taught.

Q: What's your dog's name ? A: Dog. Q: What's your cat's name ? A: Cat. Q: What's your dick's name A: Pinky

What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

Your mom is so fat that when she steps on the scale, it displays a very large number.

jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

What about all the bullshit comments? The spamming?

Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

What's worse than the Holocaust? A second Holocaust. What's worse than a second Holocaust? Being raped by Santa Claus. What's worse than that? NOTHING.

I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

Nicole Ritchie walks into a grocery store.

How to you stop the world from ending? You dont the world has been destroyed 5 times over again before and it will most likely happen to us one day.

why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

Call or text this number and say whatever 863-670-1547 or you can mail things to his house 252 village crest court lakeland florida 33809

Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...