Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

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What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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Q: What did the bartender say to the Arab as he was walking in? A: Nothing, the bomb had already killed them both.

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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Why doesn't the vampire like garlic? You have to exist to like garlic.

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What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

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What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

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Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take your fott off his head.

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you just read an anti-joke

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A termite walks intio a bar, looks the lovely timber bar up and down, and wonders out loud..."where's the bar tender?"

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What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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I Hear Boston Is having a blast.

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Why do vampires suck blood? Because they re crazy.

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What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

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roses are grey violets are grey i am color blind

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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How many dinosaurs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if you're talking about T. Rexes, you can forget about it! Their arms are too short to do anything! They can't even beat off!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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