How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

What did the robot say to the boy? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and started to strangle the boy. The authorities tried to get the robot to stop but robots are too strong. When the robot had killed the boy, it self destructed.

Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

A black walks into a bar Because it is still around the time of segregation, they don't serve colored people

It's raining it's poring the old man died die to a sudden increase in blood pressure thus leading to a heart attack

A horse enter a bar, and the barman says: "why the long face?" The horse has cancer

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person if the Jewish religion and a pizza is a type of food.

Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

How many baby can u fit in a cup? A: it depends how strong ur blender is How do you get them out? A: tortilla chips

why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

What's the worst thing about African poverty? The fact that there is no foreseeable solution to the problem of millions suffering.

Q: Why did the rich Wallstreet business man move into Harlem? A: Because sex offenders weren't welcome anywhere else.

What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A miracle

guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

A man walked into a store and asked if he could use the restroom. They found this acceptable and let him use it.

Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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