Fact: When you die, you can't eat ice cream!

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Chikin nuggets are cooler than your mom!!!!!!!

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What does the color 9 smell like? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats

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Q.How many dinosaur species can jump as high as a house? A.All of them, houses can't jump

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What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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noodles

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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

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What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead black guy in the road? It doesn't matter, I cried after both

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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jack shine and keiran = nate robinson

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What do you call a fat Chinese person? A chunk.

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A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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Why did a homeless man eat another man's face off? Because he was hungry.

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Yeah, I mean to be honest with you, I get that one a lot.

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Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parent's bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't. He said nothing, and the incident troubled him deeply for many years.

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Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she is in rehab and will unlikely get over her mental illness leading to her soon and fatal death.

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What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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How many apples fit in a garbage bag? I actually don't know. I was asking you.

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Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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