Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an axe

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

what do you do when you see the klu klucks klan ? act white

An american took a vacation to Mexico.... the American police were contacted 3 days later... the American was supposedly killed during a drug trade...

how do you make a cow float Give it 10000 balloons

Where is the last place you would find a Mexican? In a good hiding spot that you didn't think of while trying to find him.

One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why did kenny the koala fall out of the tree? becuase kenny was dead. Why did kesha the koala fall out of the tree? because she was hit by kenny while he was falling.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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