What do you call "Bob the Builder" when he retires Bob

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What's blue and can't sing? Blue.

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Q.What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A.Finding seventeen worms in your apple.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? 2 Survived.

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What's the anonymous name for vampire hunters? The KKK.

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drugs.

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Boss: Do you know what lazy means? Employer: Yes, adopting a child.

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What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

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Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

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What do you call a red sore on your genitals? Herpes, probably.

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Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

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Boy: whats for dinner Kidnapper: beans and weiners

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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What's big, moves around everywhere, and has four wheels? four TEENS on four wheelers

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Miley Cyrus.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your neighbor. I just ran over your cat.

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

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Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops