Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

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im black

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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How do you fit 94 jews in a volkswagon? two in the front, three in the back, and 89 in the ash tray

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There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

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Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

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why do you put a baby in the blender feet first to see its expression

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2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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What did the world's greatest bowler say when he got a gutterball? "Spare me the irony!" Get it? It's because he's made of metal.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Someone threw a hippo at the pilot.

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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Father Murphy met Samuel Myer on the street. Sam it's been a month o' Sundays since I've seen you. You look propserous. How's the moile business? A snip better, Father, since we talked last. And thank you. For what, Sam? Well the last time we met you asked what I did with the foreskins. Well, here is the answer, my new business. What's this, a wallet. But so smooth, Sam. Yeah, Father, but when you rub it. Rub it, Sam? Yeah when you rub it it falls apart. And you have to buy a new one! Mazel Tov!

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Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

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how many A.D.D. kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?lets go play!

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What did Michael Jackson think when someone threw a tomato off his head? The same as he was thinking before it happened, because everything that goes through Michael Jackson's head is pornographic images.

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Knock knock knock OCD

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to my house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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If video games were peaceful. Man! You are so strait! That was so good man! GG.

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An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

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How many Hairdressers does it take to change a lightbulb. Usually one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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