Hi Mum!!!!!!!!

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Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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ur mum

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Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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Obama

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

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A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

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An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come out with your hands up.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Rebecca Black.

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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The Female Orgasm

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what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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Stop making 9/11 jokes their just plane unfunny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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