Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

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Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

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A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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I don't want to share my name yet if that is okay, I mean I have not seen you, but you have seen me just saying. Tell me how old you are first, I am 26, or 27, being more or less an orphan since birth details like that kinda lose themselves. And no, its not Eliza, I will wait for you here if you do not mind, there are still people that have thought I am Nero all this while, that`s what worries me, I doubt I can convince them I am chatting with myself this time around.

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roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

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What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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bangers and mash?

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A man walks into a bar. He has a serious drinking problem and is destroying his life.

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One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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Q.whats black and white and red all over A. half a zebra

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but Im on bath salts, and you're face looks tasty;)

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Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

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What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

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where did juan go after getting hit by a bus? the ground

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What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

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A drunk guy walks into a car

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lets bomb africa

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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