what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The diamond one below is hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man drops a penny between a Jew and a homosexual. The man says "oh excuse me," picks up his penny and continues with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q.What has flashing lights and really bad dancing A.Baby haveing an eppilectic fit

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are red Violets are blue Theres a crazy ass alpaca ready to take a shit on you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

thumb_up thumb_down -44

How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving Their designated driver who they carefully selected as someone they thought had enough self-control to not drink and could get both of them home safely

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops