Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why is jim retarded? Because he fucks chickens

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo' mamma's so poor she's homeless and dying of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How can you tell if someone is a virgin? Everyone is a virgin in something. For example, if you never had sex with a dinosaur, then you are a virgin at dinosaur sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

LAMBORGHINI MERCY, YO CHICK SHE SO THIRSTY! IM IN THAT 2 SEAT LAMBO WITH YO GIRL... and I'm giving her some Gatorade because it'll quench her thirst but I'm making sure she doesn't spill on my seats because it's new, k

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the African Man get in Africa Aids

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Q.Who do you call a lesbian. A.Shhaammmmm

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Bill: Hey Scott, do you have the time? John: My name is John, you must have mistaken me for someone else. Bill: Oh. I apologize for the inconvenience. John: No problem. By the way, the time is 3:34. Bill: I don't actually need the time, me and Scott just have this inside joke of me asking the time when we both very well know that he refuses to wear a wristwatch. John: Alright

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

thumb_up thumb_down -18

1,2,3,4,5... 6.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A black man and a mexican jump of a building to see who hits the ground first. Who wins? Society.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did Timmy pass his chemistry exam? Because he studied.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops