roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

test

What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

what did the girls scream when they were being stalked? skydragon

Why did the disabled man fall of the swing, someone shot him.

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

yay for the idiot that posted "whats white, sticky and yummy? milk". WTF dude? milk has never been sticky and good at the same time and its never going to be. infact, ive never known milk to be sticky, maybe after such a long period of being spoiled the milk becomes somewhat sticky, but your attempt at creating a perverted joke that wasnt in anyway funny or even close to being correct was so poor i feel the need to post this and hope you read it and decide returning to school would be beneficial to the rest of your life. I guarantee everyone who reads your post about milk being sticky is thinking something pretty similar to what i am.

whats white and looks like paper paper

Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

Why was the man sad His son got raped

This is an anti-anti-joke.

a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

Y' can't spell rape without ape.

what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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