Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

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Why didn't the little asian kid go to his friends party? Because he wasnt invited.

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What's worse than being a black Jew? Being a racists anti-Semite.

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why did the white man jump out of the car? because the car was crashing

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm a bitch and so are u????????

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What's worse than standing in line at Walmart? Being raped. What's worse than paying an outrageous amount for whatever it is you bought at Walmart? Being pregnant with a rape baby.

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What do you call a black man walking down the street? Danger Approaching

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Ronald McDonald was chasing him.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! Who's there?! ... Ditched again!

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

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Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Why would you wanna keep an idiot busy, it's not gonna make a difference...

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

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how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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