the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human being and one is an inanimate object that people enjoy sitting on.

What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

Why did the 16 year old black kid drop out of high school? He started a successful small business selling mixtapes.

How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

What do you call a fat guy falling down stairs Japan suffering.

What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

Or something... Volume one. What do you do if you are in the jungle and get confronted by one jaguar to your left, and one tiger at the right and got only one bullet left in your gun? You shoot the Jaguar and drive home in the tiger.

Opinions are like assholes... ...they're both nouns.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

Why are Chinese women such bad drivers? Only company executives are fortunate enough to own cars in communist China. Furthermore, women are still in a subordinate class in many Eastern societies.

Why couldn't my grandpa use a cell phone? He didn't have hands.

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

Lil Wayne

Tiny timmy likes timmy turner in his time of tingling on christmas.

Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Being raped with a cheese grater.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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