Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,939

A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A christian, a Jew, and a muslim walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have a good night because no one knows they are all of different religions.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How are bananas and friends alike? If you peel their skin and eat them

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the black man watch basketball instead of Tennis? Because Basketball is a very popular sport to African Americans, and tests show they can just higher than Caucasians, Asians and Hispanics.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why couldn't timmy brush his hair? He had leukaemia

thumb_up thumb_down

Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Two black guys jump off of a building; who falls first? The one that jumped first

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

thumb_up thumb_down +5

:-)book

thumb_up thumb_down +19

I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the guy say to the mushroom? You're a fungi

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops