Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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A blind man watches TV

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Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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Yo mamma so fat We are all seriously concerned for her health

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Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

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have you seen Stevie Wonders house? Nope. oh well sorry for bothering you

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Everyone in the bar is very happy for him considering he has regained the ability to walk

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What happens when a black man falls out of a tree? He gets hurt.

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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Johnny is walking around school when he sees a kid crying. He asked the kid what he was crying about and the kid said " I was trying to talk to a girl"

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What is the answer to number 7 on the test? Time for you to get a watch.

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three peanuts where walking down a dark alley, one was asalted

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Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

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cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

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I love alchohol!

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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