Yo mama is so fat she probably has diabetes, poor circulation in her extremities, and cannot ride anything at Disney World.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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A man walks into a bar. The second man sees the first man's mistake and ducks. The third man needs to take no precautions as he is a midget and can simply walk under the bar.

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Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

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A Man buys a Prius. Hated it.

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How did the old man keep the kids off his lawn? By molesting their Moms.

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What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

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Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

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Why didn't the blond resolved the Cold War? Once the blond's socio-economic background was really poor, she didn't have enough education to solve such geopolitical conflict, envolving imperialism, international influence, militar power and scientifical power, still without armed conflicts, as the respective leaders of both United States of America and United Soviet Socialist Republics knew a armed conflict would cost too much lifes, and even in a totally utilitarian society, the benefits of the war to both countries wouldn't be enough to justify the death of thousands. Therefore, its concluded that a meedle class person wouldn't be enough capable to be the charged to solve this kind of tenssion between States, and it would be really silly if someone happened to encharge the blond in issue.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A zebra that was shot by poachers.

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where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

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What's the difference between a person and a cow? 2% of their DNA. The other 98% is virtually identical.

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who hooks up with grade 7's? •Jake Muchnik

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Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

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Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 witnessed while hiding in a closit 7 rape and kill his mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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