What does a sailboad and a walrus have in common? Nothing.

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Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

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I was gonna tell a gay joke Butt fuck it.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

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A: Knock Knock B: (No Reply) Nobody is home and the man trying to get in will come back later and try again.

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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http://suckmytriforce.tumblr.com

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Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

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roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Guy 1: Ask me if I have a banana in my ear. Guy 2: Do you have a banana in your ear? Guy 1: Sorry I can't hear you I have a banana in my ear

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He didnt.

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Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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This is my first joke don't ????mine. You did didn't you.

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Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care what a chicken thinks?

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If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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