What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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It said i can write my own joke so i did.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi would you be interested in learning about Scientology? No

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you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

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What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

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knock knock Get off my porch I've already called the police.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

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What did the janitor have for breakfast? Food

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

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What do you call a Mexican who gets shot on a golf course? A tragic incident.

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Sometimes i'm hungry.

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Why did the african kid die He was mauled by a tiger in a zoo

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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A: Why is that boy on the ground? B: He fell. A: Why did he fall? B: He tripped. A: Why did he trip? B: I tripped him. A: Why did you... B: BECAUSE I WANTED TO!

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a would chuck could chuck wood? Home depot

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Roses are red Violets are red Jimmy is red Sally is red Susie is red Jimmy is red Billy is red Carl is red Jose is red Jerry is red Ferdinand is red Everyone is red Because they all just got shot In the head And now they're dead

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Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

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A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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Did you hear about the woman that died of a heart attack? More oxygen for us!

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A paralysed man falls over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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