Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

thumb_up thumb_down

what's white and bumpy? Milk. But it's not bumpy.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A women frantically calls the doctor and says, " Doctor, doctor, give me the news! I have a bad case of loving you."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the Chinese man do with the sick dog he found in the alleyway? He took it to the vet, nursed it back to health, and later helped the dog get adopted by a nice family down the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven has an extra penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +652

what happens when a jew meets a black person answer: they greet one another

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Enough with the "whats worse than ... "jokes! They are getting old and have a millon different possible answers. I am aware that this is not a joke but thumbs up if you aggree with.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

thumb_up thumb_down +16

roses are red ur face is too and if u r hot my penis is going in u

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

thumb_up thumb_down +11

how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +9

tim rafter died no one cared

thumb_up thumb_down -11

So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I walked into a bar and it hurt because it was metal

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

An Italian man with a very thick accent decides to travel to America. On arriving, he decides to take a taxi and tour the nearby city. The man, feeling hungry after a while, chooses to stop at a bakery. Upon entering the bakery, the man walks up to the display of bread, and points at the loaves of bread he wanted, calling to the baker "I want 2 piece." The baker, not understanding the man's accent asks the man to repeat what he said. So the man repeats, "I want 2 piece, right here, right now." "Sure thing," the baker says, and gives the man the loaves of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What do you call a man who gets off the train at Willoughby? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did johnny fall down? He got hit in the head with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops