What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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hextech crafting too opieop

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Chad Wolbert is retarded.

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Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

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Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

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How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

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Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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Why are aspirins white? Because the creator of aspirin didn't feel it necessary to color the pills.

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A bus full of orphans falls off a cliff.

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why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

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what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

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A man walks into a bar, ouch!

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Lil Wayne

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What is black, white and hungry? A woman with a rare skin disorder known as Vitiligo which causes discolourtion of the skins pigment in patches; who is hungry.

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What can make you pee? Liquid

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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yesterday, a girl asked me why a guy is Bro if he bangs alot of chicks, and chicks are hoes if they do alot of guys. i said to her “well, if one key can open a lot of locks, then it is the master key. if a lock can be opened by alot of keys, then it’s a shittyass lock, isn’t it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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