I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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mom.what is red and green? dad. what? mom. your mama dad. you Mack me cry mom gooooooooooooooooood girl. mom have you seen gmom mom.no dad. your mom killed her girl. rely mom. yes girl.thanks she suck dick for money and now i have to get a new bed so thanks mom.ya dad. so you want to be dead mom and girl. or u want to be dead dad. help me plz nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo mom.yes girl yes

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MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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melon

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Knock knock. Who's there? Honey, are you hearing things again? Nobody knocked on the door... Honey-are-you-hearing-things-again-nobody-knocked-on-the-door who? ...

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sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

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What did Dr. Pepper say to Sprite? I'm a Doctor.

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

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What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? A: Hoblin Goblin.

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9/11

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

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What do you call a gay man? Phil Krahn

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alert('hiiii');

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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