Q. Why did the man crash the car? A. Because the driver was a bling man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's drivers license had been revoked for all of it's DWI's.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

thumb_up thumb_down -13

verry nice how mUCH?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is worst then falling off a tree....... Falling off a bigger tree

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do astronauts do if the want a party? They planet

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

thumb_up thumb_down +158

I got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen.

thumb_up thumb_down

* anti-punchline

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

thumb_up thumb_down +60

How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's big and purple? Barney

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If life hands you melons, you might be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Four black guys have a picnic. One of them pulls out a bag of KFC. Another pulls out some Kool Aid. The third pulls out a watermelon. The fourth pulls out a box of cookies you racist prick

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is funny and has three legs? Not the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I walked into my sister's room and slipped on a bra..........it was a boobie trap

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Womens Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops