I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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Justin Bieber

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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what is a chicken answer: chicken

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How many walls can you paint with a baby? Depends on how hard you throw it.

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There is a bus driving down the street, suddenly a man jumps out of the buss and splatters on to the sidewalk, why does he jump out? the buss driver was asian

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A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms, legs, and an eyepatch A: Names

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What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? - Getting raped by an giant scorpion.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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whats long, fat, and people love it in their mouth? blunts.

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

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Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

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Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

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how do you starve a black man? hide his food stamps in his work boots.

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Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

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Why did Captain Hook die? He wiped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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