what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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What's red & is bad for your face? A brick.

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What do you call a fish with 6 legs? A fish with 6 legs.

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Mom says my name I reply Coming.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five fingers The third one's for you

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What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

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Why doesn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it makes him mean.

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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What's Mexico's favorite sport? Cross Country

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A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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Call me Ishmael. Or don't. Well, you can, but I'm not forcing you. You could call me Steve or Bob, it's not really that important. I'm just around here anyway to tell about a huge white dick. A whale dick. A SPERM whale dick. Never mind. Or the guy whose obsessed with it. No, it's not what it sounds like. He just wants to stab it with his harpoon. Wait, that sounds even worse. Whatever. Anyway, call me Ishmael...

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I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why was six afraid of seven? 7 is greater than 6. Didn't you learn about number lines in 3rd grade?

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hey im leon and i love the chuckie

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Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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