once upon a time there was a girl named katie. she walked across the road. she got hit by a truck. now she's in heaven. the end,.

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The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

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what starts with b and ends with itch pickle

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What do you call a black doctor? Ehh...

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When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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what did the dog say? dogs can't talk therefore he said nothing

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Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

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What? Chicken butt Why? Chicken thigh Who? Deez nuts

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

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what do you call a baby in a blender? A really funny event.

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Bob: Hey, hey Jim Jim: Yeah? Bob: Remember me. Jim: ...okay?? Bob: Knock knock Jim: Who's there? Bob: I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA FRICKIN REMEMBER ME!!!

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What's worse than eating an apple with aids? Loosing your virginity to the seven chosen ones.

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more likely you are to realize that beans aren't actually fruit. They're legumes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

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Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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