A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

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What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

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Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

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women's rights

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What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

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If you are riding on a broomstick and it breaks in the middle of the ocean... How many pieces of toast does it take to fill a light house? Purple, because Oranges cannot fly.

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Why did the plane crash? Because he pilot was a loaf of bread

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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What did the pig do when the farmer died? He just stood there cause pigs are stupid.

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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A man walks up to a horse and asks, "why the long face?" The horse stares back at him, blankly. The man then sits and ponders his life, sad that he now tries to communicate with horses and realizes that his eccentricity is probably the reason his marriage failed.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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Knock knock Who's there? The chicken that crossed the road

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops