hickory dickory dock no one cares

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the immigrants.

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What did the woman say to her rapist? I've had better.

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only anal because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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I baked tonight. What did you bake? Brownies. What kind of brownies? Chocolate.

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

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justin bieber

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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Grapefruit.

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What do you call a jew in a room full of gold? I highly improbable scenario in which the circumstances of how this "man" seemingly got into a gold room are unexplained.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Nothing. He punched him in the face and stole his iPhone.

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Once I asked a Chinese girl , how do I look ? . She said you Europeans all look the same .

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How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

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What's worse than getting bit by a spider? getting bit by two spiders What's worse than getting bit by two spiders? getting raped What's worse than getting raped? a butterfly landing on you

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

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Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Jake did Why did Isaac cross the road? Because mum told him not to Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Maya was there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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