Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

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Patient- Doctor, I am feel intense feeling for 15 year old pop singers!!! Doctor- Oh, sound like youve got Beiber Fever. Patient- Whew. I thought it was something serious Doctor- Its terminal, you have about 5 more days to live.

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What's worse than losing the remote Finding it in your ass hole

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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There are two bears in a shower. One bear says "pass the soap." the other bear says "no soap. Radio."

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A bartender sees Jesus Christ, George Washington, and Adolf Hitler walk into his bar. The bartender is drunk.

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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a pornstar comes early to a party

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I like your hair

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How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

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if got a joke if fogot it

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There are 10 fish, 5 of them drown, how many are left? 10, fish can't drown

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This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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Wy did the chicken?

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What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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