I asked a Jewish girl for her number, so she rolled up her sleve

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Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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How do you call a black man selling fruits ? Yes, but I'm not sure

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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1234 5

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What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

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What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

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What do you call a Icelandic man? A guy who lives in a snowhouse with a elevator

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

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Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

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What do you call an Arabic man flying a plane? A Pilot.

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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WNBA

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A black man and a mexican are falling off a cliff. Who lands first? The police officer.

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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