When life throws you lemons, duck.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick.

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How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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What do you call you're mum? Depends who's reading it or just mum

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What do you call a shoe with milk in it? Shoe

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How do u get Hitler out of a car? You open the door.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Your mom's your dad's wife. Except when she's not.

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What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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theres safety in numbers? tell that to 6 million jews

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? their friend.

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Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

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What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: A deaf guy

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How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

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Who has no penis Religious Believers

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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Why did the black man cross the road? To rape the girl on the other side.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops