Why is Alex Mann Fat? Because he doesnt eat healthy food.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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Q: Why was the man upset? A: He was kidnapped. Two cruel men tied him to a chair in an unknown location. This man was mistaken for someone who was planning to steal a big drug shipment. They beat him unmerciful, shocked him, and hit him in the head with a hammer, and threw him out in the street, with the belief of his death occurring. A driver stopped to help the man into the nearby hospital. The man was questioned about the physical appearance and whereabouts of these criminals. He remembered nothing, and sadly, they got away with this horrible crime.

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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is your refrigerator running? yeah oh, ok. just making sure your food doesn't spoil

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Bob:well Joe, its been tough latley, I hats my life Joe: I don't give a tuck, ur retarded, you have never had any friends and I am sure that the school will have a pep fest when u hang ur self in ur bedroom. So go now! I don't know why u even r talking to me and I don't know why I am responding

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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why cant women draw perfect circles? no one can becouse it is virtually impossible

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I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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A beautoful poem: Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun! gimme all your money!

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knock knock Goodbye

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What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

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When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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