What do you call a horse with no legs? Useless.

What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

What's the cure to Ebola? Suicide

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, here's some candy, gent in the van.

what is black and looks like a rasberry a blackberry

Why was 6 afraid of 7? When 6 was younger, he was made fun of by all the bigger numbers. Everyday after school he would go home and wonder why he was made fun of. Was it his looks? How tall he was? The pain and suffering never stopped. He thought of suicide every day he got home from school. One day his mom got home from work and found 6 bleeding in the shower. She thought he was dead. She hurried him to the hospital where he was barely kept alive. After months of recovery, he started going back to school. The bullying never stopped, they started calling him a loser who should have died. He got older and depressed as a teenager. He got ahold of alcohol and began drinking. He went to meetings and got over his addiction. 10 years later he meets up with 7. It takes him back to his horrible childhood with the big numbers. Every time 6 sees 7, he gets reminded of everything. 7 had also murdered someone in front of 6.

A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

There's my tractor.

What's black and white and red all over? My dog after she was hit by a car (true story)

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

A man took a police officers gun and threw it at a baby in a stroller. He went to jail.

What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

a farmer asked me "were is my pig?" and I said ' I got hungry" :()

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

Why did the cookie die Because a fat kid was hungry

a man walks into a bar and was arrested because it wasn't a bar it was a bank and he shot and killed 4 people during the armed robbery

Roses are red, violets are blue, i get tired of this shit let's have some grey goose

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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