Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down +3

so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Its a bird! No, it's a plane! Oh... so it is.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A black man orders a pizza to be delivered to his house. He is delightfully pleased at the speed in which the pizza was delivered and decided he would order from that pizza shop again in the near future.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A guy walks into a pub. He cant walk out because hes blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Here's a joke, a black man walks into a store and buys something. that's it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a gay guy? They're both gay

thumb_up thumb_down +24

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar. On impact, he suffers quite the blow to his head, resulting in him falling unconscious. He is escorted to the hospital, where he is pronounced in a coma on arrival. His family is left devastated. His wife, who was a stay-at-home mother to their 2 children doesn't take this news very well and is sent into a spiraling depression. 16 years later, the man finally wakes from his coma to find that his son and daughter that he had left behind where now grown teenagers and almost done with high school, his wife's has remarried and given birth to his half-child. This is why you don't text while walking down a sidewalk.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

cops:knock- knock person: who's there? cops: the cops person: the cops who cops: we found the body #Casey Anthony

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man rob the bank? Well..why not?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Doctor doctor, I came here as quickly as possible, it was just the nearest place I could find. My dog he... he's panting and bleeding and I don't know what to do I think he's dying and I just want him to hold on... Please... Well then go to a vet you stupid shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "why the long face?" The horse replies, "I am Sarah Jessica Parker."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops