A lion and a cheetah raced each other and the cheetah won Lion: "man you're a cheetah!" Cheetah: "no you're lion!" Then the cheetah tears off the lions head and feeds it to their babies

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A storm be brewin!

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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nba live 13

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Whats worse then a hundred dead babies? One trying to eat its way out.

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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Why are anti-jokes so funny?

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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What would George Washington do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, which would e very unsafe to do.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? He was in a spiraling depression due to recently being laid off at work, his troubled home life, and the recent death of his sister.

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Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

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How do you make an Indian explode? Push the red button

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Dumbledore: Yo mamma's so fat --- her Patronus is a cake! Voldemort: ...bitch!

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am schizophrenic ...and so am I

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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