What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

A black gay transvestite prostitute was walking alone through a dark alley one night. Business has been slow tonight, and she is looking for anyone she can find. Suddenly a man jumps out from the shadows, and brutally kills her. What do you call her? Marsha, as such was her name.

Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

What happens when a building has a 13th floor ? You realize this isn't a del building and fall down 13 flights.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

What do you call a exceptionally funny anti joke? Well, usually cruel and extremely vile.

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... So he could be hit by a car.

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

What did the chilean miner say to the other Chilean miner? I wish we could get out of here.

Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

Q:What do you call a bird with wings? A:A bird -Ryan Vallee

Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

Q: Why did the girl fell from the swing? A: Because she had no arms.

what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

The

Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

people on this site vote for anti-jokes that make them laughed

Two Irish men walk in to a bar. Or maybe it was three. It's actually quite a common occurrence here in Dublin.

Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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