Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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There were two bagels sitting on a table in Denny's. One bagel turns to the other and says, "So how did that job interview go?" The other replies, "It went great, thanks".

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

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How did the boy get a bruise? His mum threw a fridge at him! How did the boy get a big graise? He got mulched! Why did the boy get molested? Because he was naked in Mr. Molestogiacomo's house!

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What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

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Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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Q: Why don't gingers have souls? A:Ginger is a root that consumed whole as a delicacy, medicine, or spice. Why would it have a soul?

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Yo mamma so fat We are all seriously concerned for her health

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what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

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What do you call a fat Mexican? Whatever his name is.

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Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel!

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What happened after the man walked off the cliff? Nothing. It was a foot tall.

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ok there is 3 people and the white kid says "bet i got a better dick than all of you" he pulls it out and then the mexican says "nope got you beat" and then the black guy says "nope got all you beat look" and then the mexican and white guys say "its because your black" so the black guy goes home and tells his mom wht happen and ask " is it true mines bigger because im black?" she said " no it bc your 23"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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What do you call an African American on the moon? An astronaut

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What's red, blue & green all over?

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Jumped.

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i read the terms of service when i posted this

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why did the chicken cross the road Why not

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what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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