I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

Why did the man rape the woman? He had a lapse in judgement.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

knock knock whos there i have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who Cream cheese

I'm taken

j

why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

A guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "whered you get the pig?" The guy says, "It's not a pig its a parrot." The bartender says, "i was talking to the parrot."

What did the fish say? Moo

What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

Knock, Knock ..... ..... No one is home, they've been evicted.

Why didn't john go to school? He has terminal cancer and he must stay at hospital

teacher: what do you call a math book with no writing in it?! student: idk what? teacher: a notebook! student: ok... thanks

why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no legs.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your Apple ? The holocust .

Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

A pilot walks into a bar just before his last flight of the day. "Give me a stiff one to get through this last flight, I've had a long day," the pilot tells the bartender. The bartender promptly refuses the pilot service and kicks him out of the bar, since operating an aircraft under the influences of alcohol would at least constitute gross negligence and at worst, murder.

what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

Q:Why did the booger cross the street? A:Because everyone was picking on him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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