What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? The one from the farm across the street. Can Randy come play outside?

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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What do you do when you see your wife outside the kitchen? Tell her to enjoy the rest of her day, and you look forward to spending time with her when you both get home from your jobs.

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One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

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knock knock whos there your mother open the door

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i have a black person in my family tree he is still hanging

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

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want to go home? yea

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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My uncle Magnus and my Aunty Agnus had a baby and named it.............Death.

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A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

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#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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Why couldn't the blonde drive? Because she was 14, thus incapable of having a drivers license

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Why did the ant cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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A blonde woman is creating an account for a website when she gets the "enter the following" box. The box says"How are you". She looks down at the bottom seeing the answer and puts"Good!".

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

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im jackson, i have a small willy, and like to finger my dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops