Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

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Q-What did the hobo get for Christmas? A-Pneumonia.

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What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

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What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

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Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You... and you just lost the game. -Eka

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

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Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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What has 4 legs and cant walk? A paralyzed dog

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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Four guys are on an airplane. The plane lands safely and the four guys return to their families.

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Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

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Whats the difference between a sack of babies and a sandwich? A Sand which floats when you put it into a large body of water.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

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whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

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why did the man die? he got shot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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