What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

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Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

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What happens when two jews meet in the bus ? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it's not worth telling a joke about that.

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-Ask me if i'm a crab. -Are you a crab? -No, why would i be a crab?

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what did Barak Obama order at Dunking Donuts. a donut

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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A Jew, A black, and a Hispanic jump off a building. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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why didn't paul ride the horse? he was busy

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

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Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

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Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

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What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

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what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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