What's big and green and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A snooker table

bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

God.

What did the African want for breakfast? Ebola cereal

Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know I'm not a mind reader.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

Guy 1: That's what she said! HAHAHA!!! Guy 2: That's what who said? Guy 1: I don't know. :/

Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

your dad's gay. just let that sink in.

A black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving Their designated driver who they carefully selected as someone they thought had enough self-control to not drink and could get both of them home safely

Suck pussy

How can you tell if a woman is a man? If she has a penis

what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

A man walks into a bar, and he died.

What starts with an N, ends with R, and you arent supposed to say? Never

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

Roses are Red Violets are blue You little stupid ass bitch I ain't fucking with you

A bear and a furry bunny rabbit were in the woods. The bear ate the rabbit..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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