How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

what did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing because they were both baked at 500 degrees and died

Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

What is better than AIDS? Cancer.Cancer and more cancer

Ask me If I am an orange? Are you and Orange? No

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

if this joke was a potato, it would be a good potato

tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

What did the young child with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

Knock knock. *Silence Knock knock *silence Knock knock *Silence KNOCK KNOCK. *Silence (Busts open door) Oh right I murdered Billy a week ago

Alex watched his grandfather tear up as he told him the terrors of the Holocaust. Apparently killing Jews is hard on people.

What did the snake say to the rat?

What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

What would be worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts.

knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

knock knock who's there police

why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

Why did the woman not make her husband a sandwich? Because he died in 9/11

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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