What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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bacon

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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what smells like diarrhea and looks like diarrhea? diarrhea stupid

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An Indian lady is pushing her child down a footpath in a stroller whilst leading her dog. A refridgerator lands on the mother. Why did the Chinese man behind her cry? Because loss of life is a frantic event and having witnessed such an event he was deeply shocked. He was also sad that no dogs were killed. This is because a dog killed his wife in a freak accident and he has held a grudge against the species ever since.

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When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

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Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

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"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

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Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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A man walked into his house He saw his wife having an affair with his teenage Gardner

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being in an abusive relationship.

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- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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Will there be love in your future? Click the hand with the love-line that is closest to yours

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What's red and smells like metal? A tricycle. It's covered in blood.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

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How many Neurons does a bug have? - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -- - - - - - -It's true

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How to confuse a dumbass: see next post.

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A woman walked into a club. Or at least, that's what her abusive boyfriend told the police.

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Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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