How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

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What is Debbie short for? She has no legs.

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Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

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How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

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Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: The construction of a steel-reinforced concrete wall will work in most instances, but for more resistant cases, the use of a high-impact titanium anti-rhino charging barrier is required.

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A man makes a sandwich.

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What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

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A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

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Kony 2012

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I'm Andrew Schmitt

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I love you You love me We all grab 2X4's Barney's on the floor No more purple dinosaur.

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream her cone broke

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children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

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What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

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How do you know when some one is a complete dick? When they hit the prestige buttom in Black Ops when your taking a dump. N.P.P.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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