Why did the girl not have a good New Year's? She was murdered on Christmas.

'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

Roses are red Voilets are blue I have a gun Get in the Van

A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

A man walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken I don't see anything funny about this at all. -Tag

How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

Q: Why did the Japanese man fall off the cliff? A: He was pushed

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

I am quite mature.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

silver bullet?

Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 10 dollars you would have 5 dollars more than Chuck Norris

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...