whats big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? a pool table

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Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

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What do you call a dinosaur eating a taco? Nothing, you are high.

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soccor

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What happens when a black person brakes his neck? He gets a neck brace just like anyone else.

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save me from the nothing ive become

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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What happens when you eat all the strawberries? They are GONE...

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Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

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Why did David go swimming? Pink sock.

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What is 1 inch long and eats everyone in it's way .... my pet fish

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

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Anal cheese curds.

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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There was a man on a park bench and he saw a duck fly by so he decided to go and see what it was up to. He saw that it was just going for a swim in a near by pond. He died 2 years ago of auto erotic asphyxiation because of a common fetish.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm from the Department of Child Services, i'm here to take your children.

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September 8, 2011 Amy Winehouse: 46 days sober. Date of death: July 23, 2011

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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Why are you bored? because fungus grows in your eyeballs so you try to stab it out but you end up blind and dead lol

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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