roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

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Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

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What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he was greeting his new neighbors that moved in across the street. He was very friendly.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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Justin Bieber having an erection.

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A priest, a rabbi and Santa walk into a bar. that's a highly coincidental situation.

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yo mama is so fat that a kid said to her ' The White Buddha Has Returned'

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What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

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What's worse than this That :(

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Obama ran for re-election in 2012. He lost because he is a horrible president. the liberal left blame his defeat on racists and propose harsh Hate-Crime punishments. America falls into disrepair.

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Whats the difference between a cobra and the hulk? One is my penis and the other one is a cobra.

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So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

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A Korean, a Japanese, a Muslim, a Christian, a Jew, a Chinese and a member of Isis are enjoying a friendly game of poker. The Korean man kills everyone because he has a life threatening illness that prevents him from using his brain. The worst news though was that the he lost the game of poker.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

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Why do black people smell? So blind people can hate them too.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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A-B-C-D-E-F-G-R-U-D-T-F With me

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house. Just kidding. Micky Mouse isn't real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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