What does a grandmas vagina taste like? Depends.

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I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

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what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

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An old jewish man, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

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Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

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anus soup

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Why can't Helen Kellen drive? She's a woman.

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Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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If Selfish Sam has twelve cookies and Tricky Todd asks for three then how many cookies does sam have left? Twelve. Remember he's selfish

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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What did the taxi driver say to the chicken when the chicken called a cab? "aren't you supposed to be crossing a road somewhere?" Little did the taxi driver know that the chickens license was taken away for multiple DUIs because when his wife left him he became an alcoholic mess, lost his job and became depressed. But when he called the taxi, he was on his way to a job interview. Since he never made it to his job interview he soon went broke and lost his home. Having hit rock bottom, the chicken unawarely started to cross a busy road and was ran over by that same taxi driver.

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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Why do black poeple like fryed chicken? Becuase it greases there insides just like there outsides.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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