What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A: Knock Knock B: ...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why didnt Tim Tebow go to church? He had practice half an hour before the service was scheduled to start, and to do both was impossible and missing practice would have resulted in disciplinary action from both his coaches and his teammates.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What do you call a man from south korea? A: I don't know, but I'm not letting him drive my car.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Little Billy rested his head on the pile of bricks. It had been a hard day for Little Billy, but, in less than an hour, he would finally see his worm again.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man with Alztheimers walks into a bar. He forgets the purpose of being there.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call someone who can't lose? Charlie Sheen

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Hey guess what? What? I have good news and bad news. The bad news is you're mom died. I lied about the good news.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What Would Canada Be With out Nature A: Peru

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What does DNA stand for? The National Association of Dislexics.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What is the difference between a baby and a log? I don't have a log in my fireplace

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So you go home and get on the computer. You have no internet so your stuck playing pinball.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops