michael: How old do I look? stranger: about 68? How old are you? michael: I cant remember I have alzheimers. michael: How old do I look?

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Microwave

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

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whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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Roses are red Violets are blue TEST: Are roses red?

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i said wut wut in the butt!

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how many high school boys does it take to change a light bulb?? idk the light bulb in my bathroom is out and i need to know how many boys to call over to fix it.

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The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

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Two eggs are in a frying pan. One egg says to the other, "Gee, it's getting hot in here!" The other one says, "Shit, a talking egg!!"

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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Can you spell iCup? I see you pee?

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

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Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

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12/23/2012

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Animal control.

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What is the difference between a bike and a baby? There are a lot of differences

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It was being poached

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot. Duh.

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Students, please find the surface integral.

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what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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