Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

Suzy:I love you like a fat man love cake. Dave:(proceeds to say nothing as he is fat and is buzzy eating cake)

What do you call a Jewish wanna be gangster? Drake

What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

A frog walked into a bar. Except by frog I meant Frenchman, and by bar I meant English pub. The Englishmen in the bar kill the Frenchman in a display of territoriality.

Your mom.

What do you call a man wearing a hockey mask and holding a chainsaw? A Lumberjack, I lied about the hockey mask

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Boy: "But I don't wanna visit Grandma!" Mother: "Shut up and keep digging."

What did the black man get his mom for Mother's Day? Some jewelry and a very nice card.

A blond was walking alone down a street one night. Then she was suddenly mugged and raped. She reported her attacker but he was never caught.

What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

A women left the kitchen.

Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.. wait wut are u a bitch Violet are not freakin blue its Purple

Black Veil Brides.

What was the mentally challenged kids first word? He was retarded so it wasn't a word.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Obama is a good president, I beg to differ.

What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

twilight

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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