Why did Betty fall out of the tree? Because she was dead! ????

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What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

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How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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What do you call a cheese that's not yours? Cheese

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

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An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

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How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What did the man say when he was stabbed on the street? Nothing, because he died.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Stop shitting in my garden

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If life gives you lemons, throw them at people.

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You dropped something.... Yo lip

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What do the Mexican man, the Asian man and the Jewish man all have in common? "man"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Its children were just slaughtered.

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Your in a building there's no windows ,doors and a sement floors and u only have a mirror and a table how do you get out You look in the mirror see what u saw take the saw saw the table in half two halfs make a hole clime out the hole

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Yo mama's so fat because she has a glandular disorder that makes her fat.

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A Jewish man, a christian man, and a buddist man walk in bar, They all have to much to drink and are arrested for driving under the influence while trying to get back home.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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Q. What do you get when you cross the North Korean border and an American? A. Death.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers!

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what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

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Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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