How did Chinese people get their names? They throw their pots and pans down the stairs. It says, "CHING CHANG CHONG!!!"

What's the difference between Hitler and Kim Jong Il? Hitler's German

Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water? Drowning

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

How do you stop a baby from crying? You hit it with an axe.

Who died first the cow or the cow? The Cow

What did the boy Tell to his friends? Nothing. He has noone.

why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

Meanwhile, at La'kaneisha's family reunion, they had a great time eating caviar, steamed lobster, and rare bull testicals.

What's the difference between a lamp?

Why did the woman buy peanut butter and a puppy? Her husband just died. She was trying to fill the void in her soul with junk food and companionship.

McDonald's... Giving people with swag jobs since 1942.

Knock Knock! Who is there? A 6ft tall black man who recently escaped prison that is requesting asylum in your lovely mansion. sounds legit.

Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

I don't want to share my name yet if that is okay, I mean I have not seen you, but you have seen me just saying. Tell me how old you are first, I am 26, or 27, being more or less an orphan since birth details like that kinda lose themselves. And no, its not Eliza, I will wait for you here if you do not mind, there are still people that have thought I am Nero all this while, that`s what worries me, I doubt I can convince them I am chatting with myself this time around.

roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

bangers and mash?

A man walks into a bar. He has a serious drinking problem and is destroying his life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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