Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would? Probably a lot of wood.

What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

Knock Knock Who's there? Probably

What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

Q. What did the black lawyer say to the rabbi? A. We're both highly educated professionals.

Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

8===D ~ ~ ~

King Triton: "As much as it pains me to lose you, Ariel, I want you to be happy with your prince..." Ariel: "So why don't you just turn Eric into a merman?" King Triton: "Good idea."

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

What's 6+2? 16

Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

Q) What do you call a black president? A) Mr. President

They say there is safety in numbers Tell that to six million jews

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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