A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

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How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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how do you kill a mexican? make him go to the cicus

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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Why do matt Daly jokes suck? Because he has Downs.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

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What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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Q: Why can't sally play on the swing? A: Because she has no arms Q: Who was the first to climb mount everest? A: Not Sally

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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How many black people can you fit into a cardboard box? Depends on how big the box is.

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the man was talking to a phone no answered cause he talking to a brick wall

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Why did the black man rob the russian guy? He didn't. He was too scared.

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Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

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What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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Why was the mom happy cause her daughter had an abortion

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why was the man at the tuna fish factory mad? because he was going through intense emotional trauma happening in his life because of problems with his wife and child.

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Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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