What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

The last time Jesse saw his **** was the day..........oh wait it's never happened

Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler. Good.

What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

what happens when you wake up inception

hi do you like guitars? cool i dont

I have suicidal thoughts

A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

What did the T-Rex say to the chicken? Nothing. First of all because the Tyrannousaurus Rex has been extinct for over 65 million years and secondly because Tyrannousaurus Rex's and chickens are both animals of lower intelligence so they cannot talk to one another.

Knock knock Who's there? Hello??? .....

What comes after 23? 24.

What is brown and sticky? A stick

Why couldn't the Indian kid read? He got shot in the eye.

What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

What did the blind, deaf, mute child get for Christmas? Leukemia

What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

Roses are red, Violets are blue I suck at poetry, Show me your tits

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...