A family of aristocrats walks into a talent agency and shows their performance. The talent agent asks: "How do you call yourselves?" They say: "The Aristocrats", "because that's what we are; Aristocrats."

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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So tell me what’s worse than a baby? A dead baby… Well then what’s worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a pile of dead babies? A live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies? A live baby eating it’s way out of a pile of dead babies…

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Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

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Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

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Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

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What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

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What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

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why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

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What do men and parking spots have in common? Both often have cars on top of them. Vehicular manslaughter is a serious issue.

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A guy hit his elbow. Judaism.

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1: Knock knock. 2: Who's there? 1: Boo. 2: Please do come on in Boo, its so lovely to see you!

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What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

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2 people lived next door to each other. The man said "hi" and so did the other man. What is wrong with this situation. Nothing, just friendly neighbors.

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

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What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to end the lives of two male individuals and paralyze the the third male individual from the hip down.

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Grab your Taco, you've pulled a dyslexic Mexican

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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