A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

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One Big Ass Mistake America

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Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Animal control.

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this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

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b

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A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

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what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

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How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

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If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away." -Louis

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What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? Whatever their name is.

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Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

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when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

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What do you call a really old black person? Someone's grandfather

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A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

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there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

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A: Knock knock! B: A: Guess no one's home.

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how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

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Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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