A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

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A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

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c+t+c?

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A family's house was possessed by ghosts causing them great fear and discomfort. Who are they gonna call? A real estate agent.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because he was a pussy.

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Why did the pedophile skip breakfast? He said that he would grab a little something on the way to work...

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Why is chad so gay? Its his choice.

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

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your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

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Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

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what's white and bumpy? Milk. But it's not bumpy.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

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Potato potato potato potato potato? Potato potato potato.

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Relax, I said some pretty vile things to you when I thought you where a guy seducing me while it became ever more apparent that you where pretending to be me, thing is I often use this site to vent my frustrations and earning the "praise" in the form of red thumbs by the people. I wont say your name, but I know who you are now, the girl with the big red scared eyes, I mean how many one handed 27 year old`s do I know? I am in my early thirties, that`s all I am willing to share for now, If people come around trying to poke out my remaining eye, I am ready (my waifu, is at her mother`s place, she knows I am still a wanted target by, well some people here and there.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

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Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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