Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

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You want to hear a joke? Democract

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How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

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Q: What did the blind deaf orphan get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

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How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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How do you make a blonde scream? Set her on fire.

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What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

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I knocked on my neighbors door to complain about the horrible smell before remembering I killed him the week before, he has no family and no one will ever know.

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Homosexual babies? It's a choice

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Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

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What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

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A dog walks into a forest and sees a whale. The dog asks "aren't you supposed to be in the ocean?" The whale replies, "yes."

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Why was the boy sick? Because he accidently ate his own feces.

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Why did the wheel fall of the car?? Cause you can't fit 10 pancakes inside of a doghouse.

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Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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What did the pirate order for breakfast? Pancakes.

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Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

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A drunk guy walks into a bar and falls flat on his back. Upset, he then finds a bathroom. An hour later he is arrested for beating off in the bathroom. off is pressing charges.

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A genie walks into a bar. The bartender asks for three wishes. The genie says "okay". The bartender says "I wish I was the richest person in the world." The genie says "okay." Then He woke up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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