Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure and drugs.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

Patient: Doctor Doctor! Every Time I Drink Some Tea, My Eye Is Really Sore! Doctor: Next Time Take The Spoon Out...

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house Purple because ice cream dosnt have bones

Q. How many puns does it take to make a cup of tea? A. None. A pun is a grammatical construct and as such is incapable of combining the ingredients necessary to generate a hot drink which has been popular for hundreds of years.

There was a horse in a very hot sumer day. He was in the middle of corn field It was so hot that the corns started popping out. The horse thought it was snowing and died of cold.

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

You want to hear a joke? Adobe Flash Player.

Joe is a negotiator. When joe sees someone in trouble, he tries to help them out of it by talking. Joe failed to talk to Osama bin laden correctly. Joe is no longer living in this world. Joe drank his sorrows away and died from the alcohol in his body. Osama is completely unrelated to this, his family died in a car crash.

some magicians can walk on water, Chuck norris can swim in water, faster than the average man.

What do grizzly bears and people have in common? Neither can survive in outer space, due to depressurization, lack of oxygen, and absence of basic survival needs.

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

this is not an anti joke

??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

Why does the man hate his job? He thinks working sucks?

Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

Why did the black person jump the fences? because he was in a relay race.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...