uhyuyuyhyuuuhuyuhh rice crispies

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How do women learn to drive? Drivers ED.

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What is long, hard and comes out of a gay persons bum? poo

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

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Why did Ian die Because I shot him with a gun

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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why do you care?

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mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

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A raccoon walks into a bar. He then proceded to bite 3 people before animal control got him. A black man, hispanic man and an asian man. Later they all walked to the hospital and were treated for rabies, they were all fine as rabies is normally not fatal when caught early. Moral- this story is racist cause the white man was completely unharmed, DONT DISCRIMINATE!

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What is a haiku? Are they hard to come up with? Obviously not.

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Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

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Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

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What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

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How any blondes dose it take to screw in a lightbulb? 3 one to hold the light bulb and two to rotate the ladder

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Why did the man smell like french toast? His wife previously made him a plate of it that he ate before walking out of the house.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding! Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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What did the caveman say to the dinosaurs, nothing dinosaurs are from the Triassic period 25 million years ago, while the origin of man came around 230000 years ago, so there would be a massive time difference and and would never seen each other.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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Whose your daddy? Not me

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Two men are sitting on a park bench discussing the anatomy of goats. Where is Bertha? Teaching the principals of mathematics to blind orphins in Moscow, Russia.

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Kameron Brown is gay.

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Yo mama so fat and ugly, I don't want to tell you how fat and ugly she is for fear of vomiting.

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Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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