A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

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A hobo said to another hobo "Im homeless"

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In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

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What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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det va en tjej som va inne på ica och handlade, framme vid kassan la hon fram en banan, en billys pizza, ett litet paket bröd och en mjölk. -är du singel eller? frågar killen i kassan -ja hur visste du det, svarar hon -du e skitful ju

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what happened the magic tractor?..... it turned into a field

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What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

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Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb? One, unless she's too short, in which case she may get someone else to do it for her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

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What do blacks and the night have in common? Their both worse than when it's light

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Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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