How do you make a Child cry? Slaughter his dog and feed it to him convincing him its Chili

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What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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Hey guess what? What? I have good news and bad news. The bad news is you're mom died. I lied about the good news.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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What do you call a baby with no future? A baby dying at birth.

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A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

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What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

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Why did the crab blush? It didn't because crab's can't blush.

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Q: What does a baby look like in a microwave? A: I don't know, I don't masturbate with my eyes open.

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What's worse than blowing out 1 lightbulb Blowing out 2 lightbulbs

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Q.)What did the man say to the toilet A.) Hi Jon

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Bacon is delcious.

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whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? ones delicious and the other is a watermelon

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A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

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Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

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A Jew man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? I eat pizza.

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Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

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Three blind men walk into a bar, and, no... wait, sorry just one; so one blind man walked into a bar, and... uh, okay, so it was actually more of a small post. This is pretty much just a plausible, yet unfortunate event. My bad.

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

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whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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