Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

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How do you know if you've been drinking too much? You find yourself in a closet screaming, "I'm in Narnia!!!"

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

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What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

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A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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Two Jews, three Nazis, and a black guy go into a bar. Where they have a spirited debate about Canadian football. And leave without coming to any conclusions.

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

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Why did the boy with cancer cross the road? He was hoping to get hit by a truck.

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How did the black guy survive the bus crash? At the time of the bus crash, it was a segregated community, therefore no black people were allowed on buses.

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Why did the white comedian get booed off stage? Because his jokes were humorless and offensive.

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? Mittens

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hi im paul ! im an alien :D tyuioyt5rtyuikfuhgdehjdhfghjhgfjjhfjfjdjdjd i pe out of my finger :D

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Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says to the other: "Maybe we should rethink our ways of life and realize why animals are on this planet"

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Whats the difference between eating an egg and an abortion? Think about it.

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My mates dad hasnt had a job in 20 years... its probably why there all homless outside my house.

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What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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