My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the mexican stab those people? why? he didn't you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Cleveland sports, lebron james' ever receding hairline

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Were did suzy go after the explosion? A: Everywere

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

thumb_up thumb_down

How did Mario finally defeat Bowser? He took Steriods

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happened to the blonde pregnant women? She died giving birth to her blind and mentally challenged son.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

See now that is confident and down to earth, reasonable, and all the etc etc`s, so what would you like me to fill them in with? Joking aside, you are smart, funny, you take a beating (sorry that`s today`s new low point, I have never hit a woman and never will, sure I punched down the GigaLesb when she lifted me up and my spine started making cracking noises, but that does not technically count as a woman). You are sweet, you are cute, you are funny, you are hot hot hot (hattrick see?), and yeah yeah if you want me to prove to people here that we know each other, sure, I met you once like 15 years ago? You kinda adored me, I could not take my eyes of yours (oh yeah, you got adorable eyes sure), and... You got huge breasts (Tits are more like those hanging you know what I mean) Sigh sometimes a boy wonders what he is doing with his life, he falls for the strangest girls... ...AND THEN SAID BOY FINDS HIMSELF BROKEN IN TWINE BY ME!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

GONNA

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What's the biggest difference between a black man and a white man? A: Their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops