Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

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What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

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why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

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What if algebra teachers were actually pirates, and they're making us find the X so they can search for buried treasure?

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( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting brutally raped in the anus by the Dark Lord Satan.

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How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

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Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

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What's the difference between a cow and a fat person. Nothing

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Q:how do you save a black guy from drowning A: you shoot him

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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Meanwhile, at La'kaneisha's family reunion, they had a great time eating caviar, steamed lobster, and rare bull testicals.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

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Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

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Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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