His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What more orange that a lime? Most things.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -16

*Knock Knock *Whos there? *ADD *ADD Who? *I forgot but you wana build a fort.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: If two lesbians are in a relationship, who makes the sandwiches? A: They both do.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Man frantically runs into a bar, he suffers brain damage and cannot remember anything about his life. Though he tries to make everything go back to the way it once was, he and his wife grow distant and their family falls apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was the man so fat? Because he is in a wheel chair and can't exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Donkey lips

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was little Bobby Smith crying on Christmas day? Because the doctor diagnosed him with terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the hunter say when he saw the elephants coming? Here come the elephants. What did the hunter say when he saw the elephants coming wearing a pair of sunglasses? Like wearing a pair of sunglasses as a dhitty disguise would confuse me. I took law at UCLA before becoming a professional game hunter and I've been in this business for almost 10 years. I think I know an elephant with or without sunglasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

ORGANISM. Yeah, I thought it said "orgasm" too.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

thumb_up thumb_down +12

This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops