A: knock knock B: who's there A:come in B:come in who?

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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A blind man walks into a bar. But he wasn't hurt badly and continued on his way.

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What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A Wii.

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A black guy and a white guy are in a fight, who wins The white guy because they were in a fight over when the black guy was going to die.

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what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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What's black and blue and hates anal? The twelve year old in my trunk

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whats softer than a furry blanket an indian

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

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What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

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If i have a remote that can switch people to mute, the number 1 people will be asian, and it will be on the train.

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What happened the homeless guy's home? A meteor fell on it.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He returned it to the crazed gentleman who sent it to him.

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What did the scarf say to the hat? Nothing, a scarf can't talk.

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How much dirt is in a 4 by 6 by 8 hole? None its a hole.

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What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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