Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

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hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

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You are so down to earth, and never confuse that with "simple minded".

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What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the bag.

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HTML

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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breasts

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What's bad about four black men in a car going over a cliff? It was my car.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

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What should someone do if they are Le Zirk? Have a zirk. THEN FIRE THE ZIRKKK!!!!!!!

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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Why did the sheep cry? Because it contracted cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

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How many Jews can you fit in an oven? None, it's illegal.

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Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

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Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

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why didn't the blond laugh at the anti-joke? because, she was aborted in her mom's third trimester

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What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops