A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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Quit repeating the damn jokes you jackasses it ruins the laughter. Like if you agree.

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how do you kill a zombie? Zombies arent real.

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how do you get a black guy out of a tree? ask himnicely and if he doesn't promptly call the fire department

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your momma is so stupid shes fricken retarded

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Why couldn't the black man participate in the running category of the Olympics? Because he had no legs, he was referred to the Special Olympics, instead.

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What's purple, red, green and does jumping jacks. Nothing... that sounds pretty crazy if you ask me.

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why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

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What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

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An Asian man is driving a car. He was on the way to the market to buy dinner for his family

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Roses are red, Violets are black, Why is your chest, as flat as your back

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell.

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Why was the girl blind, and deaf? it was hellen keller

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Three women are sitting in a bar. One is drinking beer, one is drinking wine and one is drinking vodka. Which one is the widow? The one whose husband is dead.

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Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

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What did the mute say to his friend? Nothing.

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

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Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

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Geography Teacher: Bill, British Columbia agreed to join confederation when the government of Canada agreed to do what? Bill: To build a bridge to where my father is who is divorced with my mom.*tear* Geography Teacher: Is that really nesscary Bill? You have a detention.

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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