Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

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Whats the difference in car and a bicycle? One has an engine and drivetrain designed to run on gas and the other is powered by your output of work

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Early yesterday around 10:23am a local women by the name of Bethany Francis Polluch died from a injury to the head. At the scene investigators discovered a tree fell on her causing the trauma. Believe it or not the tree was in the kitchen.

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the WNBA

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

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What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

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Roses are red violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo don't be sad cause I'll be there to not in the cage but laughing at you

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A man is training his dog. He tells the dog to sit. The dog sits. "Good boy!" said the man. The dog did not thank the man for the compliment because dogs cannot speak.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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A Christian, a Jew, and a Hindu walked into a bar - guess what happened then? Well two of them are alcoholics so they wisely changed their minds and left, then the other one got bored so he left too.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

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Doctor: I'm gunna try to fit your illness into an everyday, normal conversation. Is that okay? Patient: okay. Doctor: how are you? Patient: fine... Doctor: that's weird.. Because you have AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the black men.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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Me: I have a great knock knock joke but you have to start it off. You: Knock knock Me: who's there? You: silence as the person is confused as what's going on

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops