Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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What's blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath

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Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

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What's 2+2? Fish

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The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

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why was the 40 year old still a virgin? it doesnt know either.

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Q: What's worse than the holocaust. A: Me not getting my Christmas presents.

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How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

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I grammer is gooder then yours.

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Why did the man take a shower?, he didint smell so good...

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Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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stuarts mum

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Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

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Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

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2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Why did Little Billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a washing machine.

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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