A termite walks intio a bar, looks the lovely timber bar up and down, and wonders out loud..."where's the bar tender?"

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a firefighter.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. He never got an ice cream he is alergic.

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Q what do you do when your friend tells you hes a homosexual A. you tell him that you will accept him and can still be very good friends

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What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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Do you want to hear the best joke ever? Me too!

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how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

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"Doctor! Doctor! It hurts when I urinate!" "you may have a kidney stone"

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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Laugh.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have down syndrome, my favorite color is potato

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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regoereiorgiorehgijreirehrfjirgjirejgruirehgrghehiiehaoiwpo;lkswpokewqoifgoieqjgiubtfoewfiir K.O

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Why was Steve buried in Australia? Because he was dead.

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What do you call a group of men terrible at their jobs? The Mets

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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A man walks into a bra, he is an alcoholic and is destroying his family

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Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

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Q: What did one muffin say to the other muffin? A: "AAAA! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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- Why did the man with the big pocket get arrested in Utah? - Because adultery is illegal in Utah.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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Yo mamma is so fat her blood type is RAGU

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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