Why did little Susie fall off the cliff? I pushed her.

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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Too tired to come up with the definition, by the way, it was I that came up with the code system you guys use, so I kinda knew long ago that you lied to me when you said you do not use passwords,

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

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What did little Sally say to the clown after the party? 'For someone who specializes in entertaining children of a young age, I am slightly underwhelmed at the degree of humor my friends and I have derived from your jokes today.'

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I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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How do you baby sit a black child? Entertain him with stimulating games to help with his cognitive growth.

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what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock? Who's there? Not Suzie.

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why was the black guy running from the cops? i dont know either

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Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

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Tennesse

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What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

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Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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What the heck are you gonna do if you're on a picnic and have an ice cream and then the ants crawl on the ice cream, what are you gonna do? You're gonna eat the ants because it's made out of protein.

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Why was the kid happy? Because it was his birthday.

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how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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