What's brown and sticky? Anal rape

thumb_up thumb_down -40

how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, Violets are Violets. Screw this poem. Potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Want to hear a Joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Chuck noris is so awesome that he brings a knife to a gun-fight, and wins

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. Because, often, friends go out together in social situations.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why? Because.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

i told my parents that i was having friends come over my dad said great my mom said great so i said great

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Can't Sing, Or Ryhme

thumb_up thumb_down

If one of us goes, all of us go. If we all go, none of us are left out.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's black on top and white on the bottom? Half an oreo

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops