What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and your mom? Your mom's a bitch.

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What did Einstein say to the blonde? 'What specific part of the theory don't you understand?'

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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get in the car.

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What happens when you go from a jew to a penguin? A huge climate change.

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

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Penis

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog. Instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

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What do fat people and shinease people have in common? They both have a lot of chins.

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what's worse than finding out god isn't real? finding out he is

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What do you call a black lady with big boobs? Oh, wait, it's just a fat black guy.

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

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Knock knock Whos there? The Gestapo

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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What do you call a black man with his doctorate in the field of marine biology? Doctor

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Why can't you give a diabetic a cookie? Due to the lack of Insulin produced in the Pancreas, the sudden spike of sugar into the blood stream may send the person into a diabetic coma, which good possibly result in the amputation of a limb.

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why did the woman call the police? because there was a murderer pointing a gun at her at her son.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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