Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

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I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

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What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alan okay come in

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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My mates dad hasnt had a job in 20 years... its probably why there all homless outside my house.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, because feminists can't change anything

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why was the woman afraid of her bestfriend he raped her

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Two nuns in a bath, one nun says to the other "wears the soap?" the other confused replies "I am sure you mean 'where' is the soap" and hands her the soap.

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How tall is oprah.. 5'7

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Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

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It was a chilly saturday afternoon coles's brother asked cole to baby sit cole said yes and when his brother left cole proceeded to give it to his niece in the ass. Little did cole know he said his little niece on fire that was the end of his little nieces life.

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Do thumbs down me likes in this anti joke website?

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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