What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

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What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

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Phil sees a hitchhiker wandering past his car on the sidewalk. He asks Phil if he can take him to his house, and Phil says no, and keeps driving. Six seconds later the hitchhiker is crossing the street in search of somebody else, when he is hit by a bus and dies.

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What did the kid see when he fell down the well? Nothing it was to dark.

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Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

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Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

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There once was an X from place B, Who satisfied predicate P, Then X did thing A, In a specified way, Resulting in circumstance C.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

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What's black and white and red all over? Two nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

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as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

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Q- what's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A- you take of your shoes to jump on a trampoline

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

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Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

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Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

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I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

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An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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