What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

did you hear about the dyslexic, overweight, wheelchair bound blind guy? No? Niether did I, I'm deaf so don't hear about anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the alcoholic say to his priest? I'm Drunk. The priest says "Your drunk go home". He barely makes it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Did you hear about my new Muslim friend? Hes the bomb!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -107

How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a black man sitting on a porch? Relaxed.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

9

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red Here is something new Violets are violet NOT FUCKING BLUE

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops