Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Two men drove their car of a cliff. They died.

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

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A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

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A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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why did the pirate have a patch? to crack the software he had downloaded

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What's the difference between slavery and the Holocaust? Slavery happened.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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Why couldn't Danny learn the alphabet? Because a man of forty was staring at him in a very peculiar way and Danny found it very difficult to concentrate.

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Why did the little girl go to the hospital?........................Beacuse she fell when trying to steal cookies out of the cookie jar on top of the fridge.

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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Whats pink red and silver? A baby chewing on reason blades. Whats pink red silver and smells bad? Same baby two weeks later.

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Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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why was the baby crying? a rabit took her bottle and ate her frit snacks.

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Hey girl, do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I dropped one and I can't find it.

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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Why did apple fall off the tree? Because Sally was holding on for dear life and she grab the apple. The apple was still in good condition; Sally however, not so good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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