There is a knock on the door. Little Jimmy comes dowstairs opens the door and standing in the door way is the axe wielding manic fromTexas Chainsaw.

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What's awkward? Your phone going off at a funeral What's more awkward than that? Your ringtone is Highway to Hell

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whats fat round and bouncing off the ground= George goodburn

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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Q: what happens to the black guy that walks into the bar. A: He walk in ,gets a drink, and leaves

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how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

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We just got a letter We just got a letter We just got a letter I wonder who it's from Oh look, it's a letter from our friends If there is a place you got to go I am the one you need to know I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! If there is a place you got to get I can get you there I bet I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map!

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What's the difference between a duck? One of it's feet are both yellow.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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What do you call a black man that robs a bank? A bank robber

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A man walks into a bar. He pulls out a knife, shoots the bar tender, and then kills himself.

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

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Lil Wayne's rapping career

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What do you get when a white person and a black person make a baby? A possible high functioning member of society.

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A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

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a man walks into a prostitute.

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, because if it's black and white, it can't be red.

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What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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