what's the difference between me and callum ? a couple of miles.... and id like to keep it that way

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet, And so is she.

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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your face

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk and leave. 2 hours later there's a newscast about two drunken men who died in a car accident. It wasn't them, the newscast about them came shortly after

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Why does Michael Jackson have difficulty playing chess? Because he's dead, and if there is an afterlife, we don't actually have the ability to know that it is possible to play chess there.

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" I can't here you it's too dark!"

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save me from the nothing ive become

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What's the difference Justin Bieber and a Dic* the Dic*

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a dead Jewish girl that lay on the other side. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why did he die? He was sick.

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What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

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What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

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men

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Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

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A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

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Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? It's not. Numbers are not living organisms and thus are incapable of experiencing emotion.

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Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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What is Yellow and American? A yellow american

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Fart

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Never mind, that was a stupid question.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops