I was reading a book about antigravity, but I put it down because it was boring.

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A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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A man walks into a crowded bar and orders a beer. The bartender doesn't hear him due to the background noise of everyone talking and the man has to repeat his order.

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What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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why cant ben cry, because i gorged his eyes out with a popsickle stick.....

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

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Excuse me, do you happen to have the time? No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

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Erron, who the hell do you work for? I thought we where friends, allies! We have not done anything illegal ever!

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Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

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Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

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People thought hitler said "I want to burn the jews" he really said "I want a glass of juice".

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

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Jake. Walsh.

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What did Roadrunner name his car? Turbo Tax.

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When life gets you down, make a comforter.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops