Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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Knock knock I'M IN THE BATHROOM !!

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

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Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

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The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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Wanna hear a joke? Justin bieber

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a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

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What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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Your momma is soooo poor... I don't know how she is so fat

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One jew, three Canadians and a Dutch man walk into the bar. The jew buys a beer for the Dutch guy, then the Dutch guy responds with.. "Thank you."

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what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

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Why was Billy unhappy? He was molested by a black guy.

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what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, There's gas in your shower, Because you're a Jew. Love, Hitler

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DINOSAUR Street Fighter 4: Masterchief edition LOUND ONE! BAKE! And the final results: Sagat: Heh, you want some... cornflakes? *BOOO! YOU THUG!" Ryu: WHOWANTSSOMEPOUNDCAKE! *Delicious poundcake omg" "Well, at least better than serving a fucking bowl of foocking cornflakes with milk in four goddamn hours!" YOU LOSE! "You must defeat my Poundcake to stand a chance, I am the worlds greatest pillow fighter!" GAME OVER

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just two, but I'd like to know how they got in there.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

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What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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