What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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Bob fell off his roof.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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Yo mama is so fat!

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

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Get in the car.

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JUSTIN BIEBER IS A FAG

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Jews...

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

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Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

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Society.

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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roses are grey violets are grey im colorblind but your face is still black!!!

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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