When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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Who has the biggest cock A rooster

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

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There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

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Yo mama is so fat!

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Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

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roses are grey violets are grey im colorblind but your face is still black!!!

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

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What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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4 is half the number 8 is.

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what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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