Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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I'm tired of your blind jokes, I just don't see the humor in them........

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

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Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

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You copy and paster!

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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