Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

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Why did Uncle Monty shove his head up a horses arse? Because it gave Doris an erection. She chose to keep her male genital organs following her gender changing procedure, so that she could still father children.

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I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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I'm tired of your blind jokes, I just don't see the humor in them........

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

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You copy and paster!

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dad drinks a lot Help Me

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Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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Bob fell off his roof.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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