What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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Mexicans are like waffles

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If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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Bob fell off his roof.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

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Penis.

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69

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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