Jews...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +136

A baby seal walked into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Bob fell off his roof.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Yo mama is so fat!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What do old people really like? Anal sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Society.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -182

Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -190

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops