What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -112

A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

thumb_up thumb_down -148

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -150

why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +59

What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the square root of four? Two.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do old people really like? Anal sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops