A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Yo mama is so hairy, because she's arab.

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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I believe that as long as we do not change, as we decide to believe in ourselves and use our strength and potential, all that is left, is to see which side fate favors. Maybe we are meant to survive trough our strength and belief in ourselves and each other, or maybe we are, or will eventually end up as the last people of our kind, and fade away from life, proving that those that trust in the corrupt, where better than us. Suddenly I feel so alone.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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What Happends When Sawdust Gets in your mouth You poop logs

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What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Why did the disabled man fall of the swing, someone shot him.

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Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. You are under arrest for sodomy.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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