Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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A teenage girl walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic drink. The bartender declines the order as she is under the legal age of purchasing and consuming alcohol.

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

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The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

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What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the boy get for creating a fantastic AntiJoke? Leukemia

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Why did the disabled man fall of the swing, someone shot him.

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what do you call a cow? A cow

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Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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What did the redneck say to the Muslim? Nothing, he is too blinded by racial hatred and ignorance after terrorist attacks on the U.S to speak with him despite having common interests, such as baseball.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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