Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Apple.

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What did Darth Vader say when he spilled his drink? Darth Vader is a fictional character and is not a part of humanity.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

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A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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What the black guy say to the Jew during the blizzard? I think it's snowing.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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What never seems to get old? AIDS.

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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Bob- yo mammas soo fat tha.. Joe- I know...

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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