What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

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4 is half the number 8 is.

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There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

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Jews...

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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