How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -150

why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +59

What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

thumb_up thumb_down -47

An Asian child flunks a test.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What Happends When Sawdust Gets in your mouth You poop logs

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What the black guy say to the Jew during the blizzard? I think it's snowing.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops