I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

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A teenage girl walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic drink. The bartender declines the order as she is under the legal age of purchasing and consuming alcohol.

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

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Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

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Fags are gay.

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Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

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wat?

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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what do you call a man in a hole Fill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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