It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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Roses Are Red Violets are blue A face like yours belong in a zoo Don't worry ill be there too Not in the cage but laughing at you

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Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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69

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. You are under arrest for sodomy.

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Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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What Happends When Sawdust Gets in your mouth You poop logs

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Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops