What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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An Asian child flunks a test.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

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The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

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Where does a homeless person live? No where

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What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

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Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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Apple.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

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Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

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whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

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what do you call a cow? A cow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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