69

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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What do you call an Indian cook, that cooks in a Chinese restaurant? A chef

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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Get in the car.

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Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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