When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

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69

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JUSTIN BIEBER IS A FAG

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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Get in the car.

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What do you call an Indian cook, that cooks in a Chinese restaurant? A chef

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A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

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Why is your face? Because.

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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