Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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Jews...

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

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Hi

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I'm tired of your blind jokes, I just don't see the humor in them........

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

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A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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