Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -190

An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

banana

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

thumb_up thumb_down -139

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +182

Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +154

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops