The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

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Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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Bob fell off his roof.

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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What do you call an Indian cook, that cooks in a Chinese restaurant? A chef

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A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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Get in the car.

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Why is your face? Because.

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops