Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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Society.

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when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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69

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Penis.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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