"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

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The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

What the black guy say to the Jew during the blizzard? I think it's snowing.

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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