What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

Mexicans are like waffles

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

Who has the biggest cock A rooster

Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

Society.

What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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