Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

thumb_up thumb_down -113

An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

69

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -142

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the moron jump through the window?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There was a Mexican, a Chinese, and an American on a plane. The Mexican threw down a sack of beans, the Chinese threw down a sack of rice, and the American threw down a bomb. The plane landed. When the three passengers stepped out of the plane, they were hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops