My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

thumb_up thumb_down -193

What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

thumb_up thumb_down +158

Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

A baby seal walked into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

thumb_up thumb_down

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do old people really like? Anal sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops