Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

69

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Jews...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

thumb_up thumb_down -18

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

thumb_up thumb_down +157

What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I'm tired of your blind jokes, I just don't see the humor in them........

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops