What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

Why did the black man get the grape soda? It was the only soda left.

What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

A man walks into a pole.

whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

What do you call two gay black men? Homosexuals.

Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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