What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

An Asian child flunks a test.

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...