In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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A woman's opinion

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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what do you call a man in a hole Fill

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hey

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

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Roses are red Violets are blue My dad drinks a lot Help Me

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Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

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A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call two gay black men? Homosexuals.

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I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

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Test

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

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What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

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What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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