Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

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what do you call a man in a hole Fill

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What did the boy get for creating a fantastic AntiJoke? Leukemia

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

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Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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Why did the black man get the grape soda? It was the only soda left.

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You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

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How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

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Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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