What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

thumb_up thumb_down -84

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +181

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +87

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What never seems to get old? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than death? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Fags are gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Test

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops