Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

What never seems to get old? AIDS.

Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

A man walks into a pole.

What does 1+1 equal? 2

What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

A woman's opinion

What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

That was SOOOOO funny that I laughed!!!!!

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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