" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

What did the redneck say to the Muslim? Nothing, he is too blinded by racial hatred and ignorance after terrorist attacks on the U.S to speak with him despite having common interests, such as baseball.

What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

69

How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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