There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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What does 1+1 equal? 2

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A woman's opinion

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What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

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Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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That was SOOOOO funny that I laughed!!!!!

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? He was hit by a bus!

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Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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A man walks into a pole.

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what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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This is a racist joke but who cares!? What is the difference between a black guy and a bag of shit? The bag I apologize to all my fellow black friends. -Lets go MEts

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

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Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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