How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

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Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

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Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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What do you call two gay black men? Homosexuals.

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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What is a wok? A wok is sumting you twow at wabbits.

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

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Paige

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what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

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Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

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Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

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Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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