Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call two gay black men? Homosexuals.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is a wok? A wok is sumting you twow at wabbits.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Paige

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

thumb_up thumb_down +158

Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +98

What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops