What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

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Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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wat?

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

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This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

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Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

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Q: What's sad about seeing a dead twenty year old lying at the corner of a street with a beer bottle in his hand? A: He owed me twenty bucks.

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What do you call two gay black men? Homosexuals.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

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why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

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Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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