2 women were sitting quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down +105

What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

thumb_up thumb_down +138

What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

thumb_up thumb_down +132

What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

thumb_up thumb_down +60

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rihno? Rihno-elephant

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's the square root of four? Two.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops