Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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A man walks into a pole.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

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" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

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Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

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What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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What did the cat say to another ? meow

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

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Test

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

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Paige

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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