Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

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whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

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Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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