What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

yeah..

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

Why are blondes stupid? They are not. Its just in America society has been given that impression through inaccurate and crude jokes.

Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

Why did the Koala Fall out of the tree, It was Dead

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

This is my firstever post so I wanted to make it very specialand have it really mean something, then I though fark that for a joke

Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

Why did the business man move to New York? Because he saw a potential business opportunity that could benefit him and his loving family.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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