A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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What can be worst than letting someone you dont know run a chainsaw? Letting Smokey Dokey run a chainsaw!

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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Poop

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rihno? Rihno-elephant

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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A man walks into a pole.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?...... Dr Dre.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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