A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

what is brown and shaped like a tree?

How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

Im ashamed of being from Canada

My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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