how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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Poop

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

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Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops