What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

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My mumma your mumma live down the street 18,19 marble street out came you and out came me but then your mumma died from her pee

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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What did the cat say to another ? meow

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Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

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What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

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what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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What Does Alex J Simpsons Face have in Common with his hand? Spaghetti

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What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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