Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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Why women like NBA players so much? Because they have money.

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hi

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A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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How did the Jew escape being put in the gas chamber? He killed himself.

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Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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2 women were sitting quietly.

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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Jews.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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