A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

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What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

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"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Why did susy give up in the corner? Cause she couldnt fight off the black man.

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

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Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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Seen the new batman movie? [spoiler] the audience dies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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