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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

What is the difference between you and I? I obviously have a life aas you don't because you are still reading these stupid jokes.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

Your mother is so succsessfull that she can have any job she wants, she is probally going to stick with her current job though, She is a lawyer.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

Knock knock. Who's there?

What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

9/11

you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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