The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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what's worse than finding 8 babies in 1 trash can? nuclear warfare

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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Yo mama's so stupid.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................uh jk

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what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

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what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

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What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

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What is the difference between a pizza and the Jews? The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

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Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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What is the difference between you and I? I obviously have a life aas you don't because you are still reading these stupid jokes.

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matt shut up

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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Your mother is so succsessfull that she can have any job she wants, she is probally going to stick with her current job though, She is a lawyer.

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Flop dog

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How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

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What did Steegers say when he lost his TARDIS? "The niggers stole it again!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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