What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

I'm so hungry I could eat food

Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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