Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

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Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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Hello penis

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People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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9/11

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

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finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

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How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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Why Did The Girl Cry? Old People Are Funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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