When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

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Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

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the Holocaust. Because anything involving the Holocaust is automatically an anti joke. the Holocaust wasn't funny.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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Yo momma is SO black.

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

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Jews.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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A Mexican, and American, and a Chinese man are crossing the street. They all get hit by a car and die.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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Why Did The Girl Cry? Old People Are Funny.

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Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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