An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

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What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

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i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

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Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

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Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

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Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops