Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

who drinks pee? katness

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Yo momma is SO black.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

thumb_up thumb_down -39

A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -107

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -137

Im ashamed of being from Canada

thumb_up thumb_down -167

Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

thumb_up thumb_down +118

I'm so hungry I could eat food

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +40

a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops