Why did the boy eat the potato? I don't know. Neather do I. :(

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

who drinks pee? katness

A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

What's older than history? Pre-history.

Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? He received many presents because his parents loved him very much.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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