What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

thumb_up thumb_down -142

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +85

Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do you call a man in a hole Fill

thumb_up thumb_down +1

who drinks pee? katness

thumb_up thumb_down -5

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

thumb_up thumb_down -19

if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

thumb_up thumb_down -37

How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Barack Obama.

thumb_up thumb_down -121

agp

thumb_up thumb_down +102

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops