Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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Why did susy give up in the corner? Cause she couldnt fight off the black man.

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Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

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Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

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i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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who drinks pee? katness

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Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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