Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

What is Justin Beiber's favorite pastime? According to his biography, it's reading science fiction novels

Knock knock. Who's there?

What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

What's worse than an apple with a worm? Serial Murder.

Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

JFK

Haikus are rigid, Their structure gives them beauty, And if you ignore the structure they kind of don't make sense and are bad.

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

The 80's

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

Im ashamed of being from Canada

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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