Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

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Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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What's black and blue and red all over Sex

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What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

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a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

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What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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What is Justin Beiber's favorite pastime? According to his biography, it's reading science fiction novels

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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