you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down -24

JFK

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -134

What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

British Dentistry

thumb_up thumb_down +25

"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the black man die? Because he fell off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What is white and when it falls, your fridge is broken? Your fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

thumb_up thumb_down -51

why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

thumb_up thumb_down +148

A seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops