Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

69

What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

What is white and when it falls, your fridge is broken? Your fridge.

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

British Dentistry

what is worse then breaking on arm breaking two arms what is worse then breaking two arms the holocaust what is then the holocaust Obama care.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...