Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

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What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

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a man died

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Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

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alex h is such a ginger, that her hair downstairs is red.

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops