A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

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What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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My brother found snow in his hair from last year... only people who know me know this joke!!haha -sopie

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What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

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9/11

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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why did the man die? because he died.

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

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What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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