why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

yeah..

What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

JFK

Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...