What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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What's older than history? Pre-history.

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why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

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who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

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What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

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why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

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People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

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Two girls are sitting quietly.

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

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What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

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finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

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What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

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Q: What does 'A' stand for? A: Effort

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops