How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Two girls are sitting quietly.

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

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Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

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Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

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how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Your mom walks into a bar.

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What's older than history? Pre-history.

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I dont no the difference between their and there

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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