If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Seen the new batman movie? [spoiler] the audience dies

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mom walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

thumb_up thumb_down -63

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

thumb_up thumb_down -167

A seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down +10

a man died

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

thumb_up thumb_down -62

why did the internet crash? it didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

thumb_up thumb_down +41

what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops