I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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What's older than history? Pre-history.

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

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Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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9/11

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What's worse than an apple with a worm? Serial Murder.

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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British Dentistry

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What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

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What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

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Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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