What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

British Dentistry

A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

what is worse then breaking on arm breaking two arms what is worse then breaking two arms the holocaust what is then the holocaust Obama care.

How do you stop a rhino from charging? Try not to antagonise it.

Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

Flop dog

Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

Yeah Aodhans been typing up everything strting argument along with taggart

What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

Yidi Huang lives here.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...