What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

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Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

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A man walks into the bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "Oh, sorry." And proceeds to remove his horse mask.

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why do humans have gall bladders? I honestly don't know

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what's worse than finding 8 babies in 1 trash can? nuclear warfare

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

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How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

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A seal walks into a club.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

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Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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