Your mother is so succsessfull that she can have any job she wants, she is probally going to stick with her current job though, She is a lawyer.

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

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What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? he's all right now

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a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

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Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

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knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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What is Michael Bay's favorite fruit? Melon

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

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A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

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A seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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