Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

How do you stop a rhino from charging? Try not to antagonise it.

Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

a man died

you ever put a vibrating phone on your b a l l s ???

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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