"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

Fine, you got me there, I have already made sure that you get your compensation, it is the least thing I can do you let me know if anyone claiming to be part of my order bothers you again, I promise I will personally enforce strict guidelines in order to ensure that such a thing never happens again. I hope you will trust me, I will no longer call it the Order of Nero, but as you know we cannot reveal the true name of our order. I also agree to meet you in person so we can further discuss this impeding situation which I will give top priority. Truth is Nero, that I used to be one of your co workers in the underground, and my attempts at saving what is left might not be as ideal as the goals we are set to achieve are, we simply cannot expect that people excel at greatness at the first go. Of course this grave incident is not even near a "mere lack of greatness" but rather a group of people that yes, sadly have rightfully claimed to be members of our society, yet I need you to come to terms that this was a huge oversight in my vision for a new and "improved" underground society, and not a intentional attack at you and your personal security. I submit to your demands, and I ask that you partake in a small number of meetings where we can all discuss and further develop the necessary guidelines required to further solidify our foundation.

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

what's worse than finding 8 babies in 1 trash can? nuclear warfare

Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? he's all right now

What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

How do you stop a rhino from charging? Try not to antagonise it.

I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

Flop dog

Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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