When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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Your mom walks into a bar.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Whoevers at the door you should probably go answer it.

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why did the man die? because he died.

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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Jews.

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9/11

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Why Did The Girl Cry? Old People Are Funny.

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JFK

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

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Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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