why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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Yo momma is SO black.

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Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

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What is Michael Bay's favorite fruit? Melon

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Yeah Aodhans been typing up everything strting argument along with taggart

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What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

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who drinks pee? katness

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

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why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What do you get if you cross a Black Man with a Knife? Stabbed.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

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Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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Get me a sandwich, bitch

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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