What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

Am I the boss.No I was just offered the job

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

Why did the black man die? Because he fell off a cliff.

How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

JFK

What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

Theres a black a guy and a mexican in a car, whos driving? The black guy, they are best friends and happen to both be neurosurgeons.

whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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