Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

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"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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whats a dexter whats a died? HaHaHaHaHa Im so so funny

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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how many people can you eat? well, im not canniballistic, so none unless i was starving.

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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Mitch

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Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

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Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

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how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

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Why did Landry hit the man with a metal pipe? Because he was a rapist and wanted to remove his virgin status.

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

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What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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