Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -21

People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

thumb_up thumb_down +138

Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +126

You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what is worse then breaking on arm breaking two arms what is worse then breaking two arms the holocaust what is then the holocaust Obama care.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mother is so succsessfull that she can have any job she wants, she is probally going to stick with her current job though, She is a lawyer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Flop dog

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops