People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -115

A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Paperclip... BANANA?!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

thumb_up thumb_down +141

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The 80's

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops