Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

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Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

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What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

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Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? Try not to antagonise it.

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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Your mother is so succsessfull that she can have any job she wants, she is probally going to stick with her current job though, She is a lawyer.

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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Flop dog

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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Yidi Huang lives here.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

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did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? he's all right now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops