Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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why did the internet crash? it didn't

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Q: What do you call a car full of black people? A: Stolen

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yeah..

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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Women's rights.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

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What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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A Mexican, and American, and a Chinese man are crossing the street. They all get hit by a car and die.

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What do you get if you cross a Black Man with a Knife? Stabbed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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