Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

thumb_up thumb_down -110

what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

thumb_up thumb_down -132

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +85

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

the Holocaust. Because anything involving the Holocaust is automatically an anti joke. the Holocaust wasn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

thumb_up thumb_down -119

I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops