Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

Once upon a time, your face.

What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

who drinks pee? katness

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

JFK

Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

Paperclip... BANANA?!

A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

Jews.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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