I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

Barack Obama.

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

British Dentistry

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

9/11

What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

a man died

why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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