Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

69

What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

Once upon a time, your face.

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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