Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

69

What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

Once upon a time, your face.

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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