why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

Yo momma is SO black.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

What's white and sticky? Glue.

What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

Paperclip... BANANA?!

Jews.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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