What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

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What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

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A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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Why did the black man die? Because he fell off a cliff.

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a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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Q. Which is bigger, a dog or the Statue of Liberty? (Trick question! Think carefully before looking at the answer!) A. The Statue of Liberty.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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what is worse then breaking on arm breaking two arms what is worse then breaking two arms the holocaust what is then the holocaust Obama care.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

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What is the difference between you and I? I obviously have a life aas you don't because you are still reading these stupid jokes.

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What's black and blue and red all over Sex

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British Dentistry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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