what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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A man walks into the bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "Oh, sorry." And proceeds to remove his horse mask.

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What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

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what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

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what did the black guy say to the other black guy? good morning

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

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What did Steegers say when he lost his TARDIS? "The niggers stole it again!"

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How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Am I the boss.No I was just offered the job

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Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

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How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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Why did susy give up in the corner? Cause she couldnt fight off the black man.

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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