Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

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what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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How did the black man get out of the bathroom? He opened the door.

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

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Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

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How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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Why did the red head never have a boyfriend? She was a lesbian and had always preferred women over men

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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