How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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Why did it suck to be a black jew during the Holocaust? cause you had to go to the back of the oven

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Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

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Fine, you got me there, I have already made sure that you get your compensation, it is the least thing I can do you let me know if anyone claiming to be part of my order bothers you again, I promise I will personally enforce strict guidelines in order to ensure that such a thing never happens again. I hope you will trust me, I will no longer call it the Order of Nero, but as you know we cannot reveal the true name of our order. I also agree to meet you in person so we can further discuss this impeding situation which I will give top priority. Truth is Nero, that I used to be one of your co workers in the underground, and my attempts at saving what is left might not be as ideal as the goals we are set to achieve are, we simply cannot expect that people excel at greatness at the first go. Of course this grave incident is not even near a "mere lack of greatness" but rather a group of people that yes, sadly have rightfully claimed to be members of our society, yet I need you to come to terms that this was a huge oversight in my vision for a new and "improved" underground society, and not a intentional attack at you and your personal security. I submit to your demands, and I ask that you partake in a small number of meetings where we can all discuss and further develop the necessary guidelines required to further solidify our foundation.

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alex h is such a ginger, that her hair downstairs is red.

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What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

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What's black and blue and red all over Sex

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

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What's black and buried in my backyard? An African American, I'm a member of the Ku Klux Klan

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Why did the red head never have a boyfriend? She was a lesbian and had always preferred women over men

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Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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How did the black man get out of the bathroom? He opened the door.

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

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Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

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A man walks into the bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "Oh, sorry." And proceeds to remove his horse mask.

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What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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