Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

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What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

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Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

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Q. Which is bigger, a dog or the Statue of Liberty? (Trick question! Think carefully before looking at the answer!) A. The Statue of Liberty.

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What is the difference between you and I? I obviously have a life aas you don't because you are still reading these stupid jokes.

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A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

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Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

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a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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