Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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What is white and when it falls, your fridge is broken? Your fridge.

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

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Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

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What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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Why did it suck to be a black jew during the Holocaust? cause you had to go to the back of the oven

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Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

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What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

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69

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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