Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

What did the muffin say to the other? This isn't logical

What is the difference between you and I? I obviously have a life aas you don't because you are still reading these stupid jokes.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

British Dentistry

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

Your mother is so succsessfull that she can have any job she wants, she is probally going to stick with her current job though, She is a lawyer.

Why did it suck to be a black jew during the Holocaust? cause you had to go to the back of the oven

What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies? There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

JFK

Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

69

So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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