How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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What was the dying boy's last wish? Not to die.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Flop dog

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

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What do you call a pakie flying a plane The pilot... or a terrorist it up to you

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What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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why did the baby cry? Someone threw a brick at his head.

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The 80's

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Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

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Why was the little boy sad? Cause his mum died of a terminal illness. Why was the little girl sad? Cause she was his sibling.

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Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops