Part 1 - Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Part 2 - Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy!

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What did Steegers say when he lost his TARDIS? "The niggers stole it again!"

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

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ObamaCare

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Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

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69

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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why do humans have gall bladders? I honestly don't know

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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Andy Warhol said we will all be famous for fifteen minutes. My soccer coach molested me and the trial was televised, they obscured my face and voice because I was twelve at the time.

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Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

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What has two thumbs and cancer? This guy.

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Backwards write to fun is it. As long as its forward. Emu

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

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Am I the boss.No I was just offered the job

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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Q. Which is bigger, a dog or the Statue of Liberty? (Trick question! Think carefully before looking at the answer!) A. The Statue of Liberty.

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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