what does an Ethiopian man say to greet a Chinese man well, first they must locate a translator fluent in both said languages, but they would most likely say hello

The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

What was the dying boy's last wish? Not to die.

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

How did mary and molly have sex it is impossible for two women to perform sex

a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

What is the difference between you and I? I obviously have a life aas you don't because you are still reading these stupid jokes.

A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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