Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

A batch of muffins is cooking in the oven, one muffin says to the others "it's hot in here!" the other muffins don't respond because they're muffins. He's the only of his kind.

Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

Part 1 - Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Part 2 - Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy!

You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

What did Brielle say when she fell off the swing? Ow.

What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

how do you double your cash? You rip it in half.

Backwards write to fun is it. As long as its forward. Emu

Q.why did the car crash? A.becaus eit was drivin by a sack of potatos.

whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...