A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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whats a dexter whats a died? HaHaHaHaHa Im so so funny

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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what does an Ethiopian man say to greet a Chinese man well, first they must locate a translator fluent in both said languages, but they would most likely say hello

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What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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Why did it suck to be a black jew during the Holocaust? cause you had to go to the back of the oven

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So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

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Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

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What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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Q: What did the bartender say to the Arab as he was walking in? A: Nothing, the bomb had already killed them both.

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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