Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

JFK

What do you call a sexually abusive man. Dad.

How did mary and molly have sex it is impossible for two women to perform sex

What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

Why did Henry jump of a cliff? He was in deep depression.

what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

Q: Why did the man take a shower? A: because he was dirty.

Yeah Aodhans been typing up everything strting argument along with taggart

A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

matt shut up

If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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