Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

What has two thumbs and cancer? This guy.

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

what does an Ethiopian man say to greet a Chinese man well, first they must locate a translator fluent in both said languages, but they would most likely say hello

What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

Yidi Huang lives here.

Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

What was the dying boy's last wish? Not to die.

Mitch

Flop dog

If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

shall i compare thee to a summers day, no, because thee are ugly, yay

Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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