What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

Why do latins like soccer so much? Because it's a very popular sport in the whole world.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

Jesus may have walked on water, but Stephen Hawking runs on batteries.

Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

Q: What did the bartender say to the Arab as he was walking in? A: Nothing, the bomb had already killed them both.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

Backwards write to fun is it. As long as its forward. Emu

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

Then lets give this another shot, this time we stop questioning how to make others happy, and if that is what makes us happy, then we ask: What else.

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

I dropped two snare drums and a cymbal down a hole earlier. They're probably broken now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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