Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

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A. Four gay men walked into the bar there was one stool left what did they do? B. They flipped the chair upside down By grant c

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Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

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69

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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A guy walks into a pub. He cant walk out because hes blind.

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Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

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Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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How do you starve a black man? You don't feed him.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

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What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

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What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

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Why women like NBA players so much? Because they have money.

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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Then lets give this another shot, this time we stop questioning how to make others happy, and if that is what makes us happy, then we ask: What else.

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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