Good for him. Thats wonderful!

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

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I dropped two snare drums and a cymbal down a hole earlier. They're probably broken now.

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Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

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A man walks into the bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "Oh, sorry." And proceeds to remove his horse mask.

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Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

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How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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whats bright and yellow? the sun.

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What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

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Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

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pizzano is a tool.

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126

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What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

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What has five letters and sounds like "trucks?" Vroom

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

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why do humans have gall bladders? I honestly don't know

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How did mary and molly have sex it is impossible for two women to perform sex

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What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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